Red & White
by Lola
Summary: Chapter 10*NEW* Ken's depressed, Weiss and Schwarz are together on a trip together. Why? Because it\'s sexier if there are more of them ^_^! Aya/Ken/Schu Yoji/Crawford Omi/Nagi.
1. Snow

Red & White  
By Lola  
  
Disclaimer: No...I don't own Weib. Oh the tragedy!  
Warning: Angst? O_o I guess that's what this is. ^_^ Oh yeah and there's some mild swearing, inevitable when Schuldig's involved.  
Pairings: Uhh...Ok, Omi and Nagi have a thing going on...Crawford/Yoji Aya/Ken/Schuldig. Ah love triangles or hexagons....who knows? Such a wonderful thing!   
A.N.: First of many chapters I'm sure. Thanks to all those who reviewed Games! You guys are what I live for! I dedicate this fic to all you beautiful people!   
And for my lovely Zu, such a naughty kitten, I could just bite you! ~.^  
  
A flash of red on white. The flutter of wings. A cardinal perched on the swaying limbs of a snow covered cherry tree. Beautiful in its simplicity. Like Aya, or Ran rather now that his sister was awake.   
Brown eyes watched in captivation as the bird flitted between the branches, preening. Wet snow, the kind kids love to make snowmen with, drifting lazily. Occasionally, a branch laden with too much white cold would bend, sending its burden tumbling to the earth.   
A sigh. The twenty one-year-old boy gazed through the white lace curtains. If only people's burdens could be so easily forgotten. He felt two hot streaks down his cheeks. He was crying, silently. Not that that was surprising, he hadn't smiled in nearly two months, perhaps a bit more.   
Strange, he was usually the cheery one. Well...next to Omi. But things were just wrong now. Very very wrong. He let out a humourless laugh.   
"When did I become so cynical? So jaded?" his voice sounded strained even to his own ears. Probably because he hadn't spoken yet this morning. Sleep and sadness clung to his throat making his voice sound more like a croak.   
The phone rang.  
Ken reluctantly turned away from the vision of falling snow and bright red feathers. But he had to answer; he was the only one inside out of the seven of them. Yes seven. Schwartz was here too. Well all except the crazed Irishmen. Rumour had it that during these past two years since the end of the battle, he had returned to his homeland and had even found himself a fiancee. Will wonders never cease? Ken thought bemusedly as he reached to pick up the phone of polished marble and gold. He stared at it for second, so much for the rustic cabin look, then shrugged as his fingers curved around the cool stone.  
It was Omi. Calling from a cell no doubt. He was giggling hysterically, begging Ken to come outside and join the Weib versus Schwartz snowball fight. They were all outside pummelling each other with lobs of snow, Omi, Yoji, Schuldig, Crawford, Nagi, Ran...well ok, Ran probably just leaned against a tree with an arched eyebrow as if daring anyone to strike him with a snowball. That was probably the reason why Omi wanted Ken to come and help to even the odds.   
Ken heard Omi yelp, followed by more giggles as the blond boy pouted that Nagi was not allowed to use his powers. Strange how two years of peace had somehow brought them all together. A common understanding. A bond between killers. That's why they were here wasn't it? It the mountains, on a ski trip. They had even almost become friends. Actually friends was a rather strong word although it could certainly be applied to the blossoming relationship between Omi and Nagi. Ken suspected that their acquaintance bordered on something more than friendship though.... As for the others, Ran seemed indifferent to everyone, no big surprise there, Yoji got along with Schuldig and Crawford, often chatting with the oracle late at night over mugs of coffee, and Ken...Ken just got along with everyone right? Well sure at first but of all the dark hunters, he had become closest to the German.   
He quietly and politely refused Omi's request, wincing a little as he returned the receiver to its nest with a clang. He shuffled back to the window. Pure endless white.   
The cardinal was gone.   
********  
Six men. Wet, cold and giggling. Or rather, Omi laughed enough for all of them. The laughter and sloppy noise of boots and soggy mittens being peeled off alerted Ken to the return of his companions. Briefly, he wondered if he should greet them.  
Very briefly.  
He raised his mug of tea to his lips, watching the snowfall as if the everlasting movement might prove to be therapeutic. The white powder erasing all traces of colour from the environment. Cloaking all in a strange whitish blue. Beautiful yet frightening. Like the allure of death.  
A voice was calling his name. Hmm...Crawford by the commanding tone and the deliberate footsteps pounding toward him.  
Ken felt his presence before he noticed the glint of the man's glasses in the window. A request for coffee, hot chocolate for Omi and Nagi of course. Ken nodded absently. His eyes flicked from the snow to the man behind him.   
Crawford's eyes studied the man framed in lace curtains and falling snow neutrally, assessing impassively.   
Ken looked away first.   
Slippered feet padded softly to the adjacent kitchen. Crawford followed. Ken's hand closed around cold metal. A twist. Water gushed forth into the sink. Wordlessly, Crawford handed the man the kettle. Fingers brushed fleetingly.   
Ken placed the kettle on the stove and turned on the element. Crawford was still staring.  
"What?"  
The man pushed up his glasses with his middle finger. Stringy black bangs shifted as he tilted his head to the light of the window. White light reflecting blue-black strands.   
"Ooo I can feel the tension!"  
A dry laugh. Ken rolled his eyes. Three long swaggering strides brought the redheaded German between the two men. He eyed them both. Green eyes glinting. Silence.  
Schuldig waited.   
He glanced at his watch.  
The kettle began to whistle. Steam erupted upwards from the spout. Ken rocked back from the jets of hot steam, slipping an oven mitt over one hand before removing the kettle from the stove.  
Crawford placed the six mugs in a row. A rush of cold air against Ken's back. Schuldig had opened the fridge.  
"Where's the milk?" his voice already laced with irritation after only a moment. Ken turned to answer, flushing momentarily at the sight of the tall muscled German bending in front of the fridge, dark blue jeans straining against firm flesh. His mouth hung open, the words at the tip of his tongue.  
Schuldig laughed, catching a little of the brunette's thoughts regarding his posterior as well as gleaning the location of the milk.   
Schuldig flashed Ken a smirk as he reached around him, dipping his fingers into the sugar jar and popped a star shaped sugar cluster into his mouth, "That's why I love you Ken, your thoughts provide such useful knowledge".  
Ken nearly dropped his mug of tea.   
"Be good Schuldig," Crawford implored, hands hovering uncertainly over each mug as he tried to recall how the other men took their coffee.   
Ken's brow creased thoughtfully, "Black for Yoji, just milk for Aya, four marshmallows for Omi".  
A thin red brow raised impressed, "You remember all that kitten? How thoughtful".  
Ken shrugged, thick red sweater shifting against his skin, "It just happens when you spend a lot of time with people, you get to know what they like".  
Crawford left with the tray of mugs for Yoji, Aya and the two boys. Schuldig watched the creases in the American's shirt shift as he walked. Lost in thought. Or rather momentarily distracted until Ken tried to escape the kitchen.  
The taller man placed a hand on each side of Ken's waist, capturing him between his body and the counter. Orange strands tickled Ken's forehead and cheeks as the telepath leaned down.   
"Do you know what I like...?"  
Had it been Omi, the boy would have blushed cutely, Aya would undoubtedly punch the man in the face, and Yoji...well Yoji would play along and the whole affair would somehow end up in the bedroom. But Ken...Ken should have been flustered or at least confused but the man didn't even blink.  
"Heavy on the sugar and cream".  
Schuldig's hands fell to his sides. Damn that boy was just too innocent sometimes.   
Ken pushed past. Schuldig listened, leaning his elbows against the counter where Ken's back had been pinned moments before. Ken's footsteps paused at the entrance, a creak in the floorboards revealing hesitation.   
The footsteps resumed, muffled now by soft carpet.   
Schuldig looked up and stared out the window, he could hear Yoji's rich laughter in the living room accompanied by Omi's girlish giggles and Nagi's more reserved chuckle. His long tanned fingers curled around his mug of coffee. He pushed the window open. A rush of cold air swept through his hair, carrying traces of snowflakes. He let them melt against his face, sliding down his face like tears. Tears that he could no longer shed.  
********  
Ken's feet led him up the wooden staircase. He walked down the long corridor, pausing before a door. Ran's room.   
His fingers slid down the polished wood reverently. How many nights had he lingered outside Ran's room at home? Hoping for some form of comfort, even a smile would have sufficed. How long had he loved him? Did it matter?   
Ken leaned his forehead against the cool wood of the door. His eyes slid closed as he replayed last night's confession in his mind.  
~He had been sitting on his bed, knees drawn up to his chest. His door had opened revealing a tall figure framed in the dimmed light from the hall beyond. Dark eyes gazed up in shock as Ran entered. Smooth movement and pure beauty, oh yes that was Ran.   
In the darkness Ran's pale arms wrapped around Ken tightly. Ken gasped. He could feel his leader's muscled chest through his v-neck black shirt pressing against him.   
"R-ran?" he asked uncertainly.  
His voice was soft, low. Ken's heart was racing. "I...never wanted to hurt you, Ken."  
Ken's hands tentatively slid up the redhead's back. The darkness hid his blush at their proximity but could not mask the tremor in his voice.  
"W-what?"  
Ran's fingers slowly trailed up Ken's spine, cupping the back of his neck.   
"I've wanted to be with you for a long time Ken, but...when you told me how you felt I was shocked by the intensity of your emotion, I never dreamed that I could have captured your heart".  
Ken closed his eyes, leaning his head on Ran's shoulder. Elegant fingers carved from marble tilted Ken's chin upward. The arm around Ken's waist tightened.  
"I don't deserve it."  
Ken's mouth opened to protest. The bed creaked as bodies shifted. Lips joined in the dark. Ken's body stiffened. Ran nipped at Ken's bottom lip as he pulled away.   
"Sleep well Ken".  
Brown eyes trailed after the lanky figure, bewildered. Ran almost seemed to smile as he paused in the doorway.  
"Oyasumi".~  
Ken shook his head, brushing his fingers across his lips absently. Was one kiss, one moment supposed to heal three years of rejection? Why now? Why....  
He hadn't spoken to Ran since. It was just too bizarre; part of him couldn't help but wonder if maybe it was some sort of joke. Why after all this time did Ran step forward? Ken had revealed his feelings two years ago!! And the cold tight-lipped leader of Weib had merely blinked and then walked away. Not even one word of explanation.   
Ken shoved his door open with a growl. The nerve! After all the tears Ken had shed, all the sacrifices. Suddenly Ran waltzes in delivering kisses and warm embraces as though they were a gift from God.   
It was all wrong.  
Why had he let Ran kiss him like that, without even asking why?   
Ken collapsed into his bed, face buried deeply in his feathered pillow. His chest felt tight. Ragged sobs assaulted his spine, muffled by the pillow and a woollen quilt.  
********  
A soft rapping on a wooden door. Eyes snapped open. A face caked with tears. Blurred vision misted from the claws of sleep.   
Sure footsteps.  
Ken rolled over, tangling himself in his pillows and a fleece blanket which had somehow found itself wrapped lovingly around his body.  
A soft chuckle accompanied by the scent of cigarettes. Yoji.  
"You've slept the day away Kenken, you alright?"  
Green eyes sparkled. Ken tried to blink away the tiredness which veiled his eyes.  
"Who?" he asked through a yawn, indicating the blanket.  
Smoke curled from Yoji's perfect mouth in a swirl. "Ran".  
Ken froze. His fingers gently ran over the fabric of the blanket, feeling its warmth, wondering if it came from Ran's fingertips. Ran had been in his room.  
Long fingers laced through Ken's short brown hair for a quick tussle. Ken smiled, trying to hide his blush. Yoji's weight settled beside Ken on the soft mattress, hand still caressing Ken's hair.  
Ken's eyes watched the cigarette dangling from Yoji's lips. He leaned his head on the older man's shoulder with a sigh. Yoji lifted his chin to give Ken room to get comfortable before resting his cheek against the younger man's soft hair. Ken noted with amusement that the resident playboy still wore a crop top and low cut jeans even in the middle of winter.   
A lanky arm slung around Ken's broad shoulders, "Saa...what's wrong Kenken?"  
"I don't know. I feel tired...anxious..." he gestured vaguely in the surrounding darkness.  
Yoji's hand still stroked Ken's hair.  
Both men parted with a start at the sound of someone clearing their throat.   
Omi and Nagi stood smiling in the entrance to Ken's room looking like they were about to burst into giggles and from the way Omi quickly turned away and his shoulders shook, it appeared that he couldn't hold it in.  
Yoji raised an eyebrow at the brunette.  
Nagi shot a glance at Omi, a smile catching his lips too as the blond boy straightened though his dimples still showed and residual laughter glittered in his eyes.  
"Brad says dinner is ready, so if you're hungry come down before it gets cold".  
Ken shrugged, "I'll pass".  
Yoji's eyes followed the two boys as Nagi guided the other out, applying slight pressure to the his back with one hand. His fingers lingering longer than necessary. Ken noticed this too, exchanging knowing glances with Yoji.  
Yoji stretched his tall frame, bestowing a lovely view of toned abs to Ken.   
"You should try to eat ne Ken?"  
"Maybe later".  
Ken smiled up at his friend, hoping the darkness masked his eyes enough to hide the pain that lay therein.  
Yoji shrugged, "Cheer up Kenken!" and with that the lanky blonde leaned in and kissed Ken on the cheek, soft waves smelling of his cologne brushing against Ken's neck and chin.  
With a wink and a patented Kudou grin which could make any girl melt, Yoji was gone. A faint whisper of smoke in the air the only indication that he had been there.  
Ken still held the fleece blanket in his hands, staring blankly into the darkness. Downstairs feet shuffled and chairs moved as everyone sat down for supper.   
'Ken?'   
Schuldig's voice reached out to him.  
'You're not coming down?'  
'No.'  
'Ran is worried about you. So come down. His thoughts are too damn sentimental and annoying'.  
Ken laughed bitterly. Somehow he doubted that. 'Deal with it Schuldig.'  
'Come. Down. Now.'  
When Ken made no move to rise from his bed, Schuldig did the only thing he could. He opened up all the pathways into the minds of the other men at the table, directing all their stray thoughts at Ken.   
The former soccer player clutched his head in shock as wave after wave of pure thought assaulted his mind. Was this what Schuldig had to deal with on a daily basis? Gods it hurt. It hurt but the German was able to make his point. Along with all the other random thoughts, Ran's could also be heard.  
Concern.  
Warmth.  
All for Ken.  
Ken's eyes shot open. He was shaking.  
The crashing return of deafening silence.  
Ken's room seemed to spin in the shock of silence and darkness.  
'Now stop being stupid and get your pert little ass down here kitten'.  
Ken ran his fingers roughly through his hair, tugging at his red sweater in an attempt to look presentable, not quite understanding why he cared. Hiding his fists within long sleeves, he sauntered down the stairs, sighing as he approached the dimmed lights of the dining room.  
Candlelight flickered off the handsome faces of six young men. Violet eyes held Ken in place in the doorway. Ran rose.   
A hand slapped Ken's back. Yoji pulled Ken into a vacant seat at his side. Having already risen, Ran bestowed a smile on Ken. The brunette nearly choked on his glass of milk. Schuldig smirked.  
Ran's slender body glided past Ken's chair, one finger dragging sensuously across his shoulder blades as he went into the kitchen.  
Ken flushed. A quick glance around the table surmised that no one had noticed. Omi and Nagi devoured their pasta with gusto, draining their wineglasses as if it were no more than flavoured water. Crawford leaned back in his chair watching Yoji intently as the sandy haired man sucked on an olive he had plucked from the salad.  
Everyone was in their own world...  
Or so Ken thought until he glanced straight up into the emerald gaze of the telepath. A grin was quickly spreading across those thin lips. Ken shivered.  
Schuldig glanced towards the kitchen meaningfully.  
'He wanted you to follow him'.  
Ken shrugged and shovelled a forkful of pasta into his mouth. Ran returned, two more bottles of wine in hand. Red and white.  
Ken stared as one pale hand closed around a green bottle, red liquid pouring into a crystal glass. Ran raised the sparkling glass to his already wine-darkened lips. Crimson velvet gliding down a perfect white throat.   
Ken's throat went dry.  
Schuldig laughed. Eyes still focused on Ken.  
"Cute moustache".  
Ken frowned then realized he must have a milk moustache. He reached for his napkin but was stopped as long fingers snatched it from beneath his hand.  
"Allow me ne Kenken," Yoji tilted Ken's chin with one hand, gently dabbing at his upper lip with the napkin. Ken flushed not only at the almost motherly gesture but also at the fact that three sets of eyes narrowed at the action.   
Ken needed air. Fast.  
Without another word, he rose. Nearly toppling his chair over in his hurry. He ran. Grabbing any coat as he passed. Somehow he stepped into his boots. The door flew open under his weight, then he was in the snow. Surrounded by silent whiteness. His eyes stung from the sudden cold, eyelashes crystallizing in seconds. Still he ran. Snow crunching beneath his boots.   
Someone called him from the house. Their voice blurred by the wind and lost in the night.   
His heart was pounding, his breath coming in ragged half-frozen gasps. The ground seemed to shift beneath his feet, his boot slipped in the thick snow. And then he was falling. His back hit the ground sending a spray of cold snow down his neck and into his face. Ken smiled. Nestled in the embrace of winter. His eyes closed.   
Snowflakes drifted lazily, melting on his hot lips and adorning his dark hair like diamonds.   
********  
Schuldig was the first out of the dining room. Ran close on his heels. Omi and Nagi stared at each other in confusion at a loss concerning Ken's strange behaviour.   
Yoji moved to follow the two redheads but was seized by the shoulder firmly. The lanky assassin spun to glare at Crawford in bewilderment.  
"Why are you stopping me? Ken's in trouble!"  
Crawford shook his head ever so slightly, "Leave this to Schuldig and Ran".  
"Ken is my friend Bradley! And he's upset, don't try to stop me!"  
Yoji wrenched himself out of the other man's grip and nearly bashed into Schuldig as the redhead came charging back into the room. The German seized the oracle by the shoulders and shook the man roughly.  
"Did you see? Do you know where he is?"  
Crawford searched the other man's eyes for a long moment.  
"Damn it Brad! Answer me!"  
He could already feel the telepath's mind wrapping around his own, prepared to break every shield if need be to get what he wanted.   
Crawford adjusted his glasses as he coolly peeled the other man's fingers from his arms.  
"I don't know where he is."  
Schuldig spun around, heading towards the door once more, "Fuck".  
"But I do know that you will bring him back safely".  
The German nodded as he pulled a pair of black leather gloves over his hands, along with his boots. Yoji tried to follow but was held back yet again.  
"Why won't you let me go?!"  
Crawford studied the man then sighed as he released him and stepped away to toy with his glass of white wine, half-drained on the table.  
"In matters of love an extra party would only interfere".  
Yoji frowned in puzzlement, watching as Schuldig and Ran's forms disappeared into the night. "But you let the two of them go...." his voice trailed off in realization and he turned his green-eyed gaze sharply back at Crawford. "What have you seen?" he asked quietly, his voice almost a lament.   
Crawford smiled thinly. Yoji looked down to his hand which was clenched in a tight fist. He still held the napkin he had wiped Ken's lip with.  
********  
Schuldig ran through the drifts of snow-laden wind. Raising his arm occasionally to block the wind from his eyes. Ran had sped off in the opposite direction. One of them was bound to find him. Brad had said so. Then why is my heart beating so fucking fast and I feel like I can't bloody breathe? Must be the cold. And the fact that he had been running for ten minutes now. A difficult feat when you're a steady smoker. Schuldig made a mental note to quit.   
Using Ken's thoughts as a guide, he ploughed onward. He could tell from the dreamlike sporadic thoughts coming from Ken that he was close to losing consciousness. What the hell had happened? More importantly, why hadn't Schuldig taken the time to find out? A second. That's all it would take. A quick sweep of Ken's mind and he could have all the answers he wanted. Schuldig swore for the tenth time, why was is so blasted cold?   
Endless white. That's all he could see.   
'Ken where are you, you baka!'  
There! Amongst the glittering night snow there was a shadow vaguely man shaped. Schuldig rushed forward, warmth washing over him as he recognized the dark brown hair despite being crowned in snow.   
He knelt in the snow. Hesitant to brush the snow from Ken's form. Somehow, the white glittering dusting gave him the illusion of a sleeping angel. Schuldig leaned forward to ascertain if the man still drew breath. Too close.  
He found his lips pressed against Ken's. They were cold, though they warmed instantly with his kiss. Ken stirred but did not awaken. Schuldig removed his scarf and quickly wrapped it around Ken's neck. His hands paused, cupping Ken's face. Wishing it weren't cold so that he could run his fingers over the skin without gloves. He frowned then tugged his black gloves off with his teeth. Grabbing Ken's frozen fingers; he breathed hot breath onto each one before placing his gloves on Ken's hands. Nodding in satisfaction, he hefted Ken onto his back.   
'I've got him Ran'.  
Schuldig glanced at the sleeping face resting on his shoulder and wondered if perhaps it just might be the other way around.   
********  
Tobacco? Was that the scent? Hmm...yes like Yoji. My hands feel warm. It's cold but Yoji is keeping me warm. His hands are never cold.   
Ken's mind played out a scene from the beginning of winter.   
Yoji and Ken walking in the cold to the convenience store in the middle of a cold wintry night. Why? The need for sweets obviously.   
Lawson's being the closest, they entered. Ken grabbed some strawberry Pocky and some shichiken onigiri. Yoji frowned.  
"They don't have any Skittles!" he groaned.  
"Of course not Yoji! They don't sell Skittles in Japan!" Ken giggled as he paid the woman at the cash.  
Yoji placed a hand on his bony hip, "Then how come Crawford always has them?"  
Ken shrugged, "Sends for them from home?"  
Yoji pouted as they exited, not pleased with being denied his favourite treat. Ken was still laughing. Breath clouding the air around him in hazy puffs.   
He shivered as he shoved a pocky into his mouth. His hands were so cold. Yoji noticed and seized the brunette's hands in each of his own.  
"Oy Ken, your hands are freezing! Let me warm them for you ne?"  
Ken nodded dumbly.  
He was soon blushing as Yoji's hands warmed him yet still held on.   
"Sorry".  
Yoji laughed as he slung an arm around Ken's waist. They resumed walking.   
"What for?"  
Ken smiled shyly, "For having cold hands all the time".  
Yoji squeezed Ken a little tighter, "Don't be silly Kenken, besides you know what they say, 'Cold hands warm heart'".  
Ken laughed and leaned into Yoji. Frowning when he felt something dig into his side where he was pressed against Yoji's pocket. He dove his fingers into the pocket before Yoji could protest and pulled out an unopened bag of Skittles.  
Yoji stared in wonderment as though Ken had just held up the stars in his hands.  
And then they both burst out laughing.   
The rest of the journey home was filled with giggles and candy. Yoji held up a red one and beamed into the moonlight.  
"Red is my favourite, how about you Kenken?"  
"Me too".  
Yoji glanced back into the package and his shoulders slumped.  
"Ahh...sorry Ken, I ate the last one".   
He stuck out his tongue for emphasis displaying the shiny red candy. He closed his mouth then smiled mischievously. Grabbing Ken by the collar of his jacket he pulled the man close, "But I can let you taste it".  
Ken's eyes widened and he tried to back up. Instead he got his feet tangled and fell back into a snow bank; Yoji plastered on top of him. His breath smelt like lime and cherries. They stared searchingly into each other's eyes uncertainly. Then as if realizing the absurdity of it all burst out into giggles once more.   
Yoji extended his hand, helping Ken up easily.  
Ken dusted off his pants with a grin, "Ne Yotan, is there anything you like better than Skittles?"  
"Vanilla".  
Vanilla?!  
Ken frowned. That wasn't what he had said...no wait that was what he was smelling, vanilla and tobacco mixing with leather. Not Yoji. No. Someone else.  
The name came out vocally in a strangled cough.  
"Schuldig?"  
Ken was being carried of that he was certain. His head leaned on the German's shoulder, orange hair tickling his face. Schuldig had his arms hooked securely under Ken's legs, supporting him. He opened his eyes blearily, palms flattening against the older man's chest. He held on tightly.  
Schuldig let out a dry laugh, "Ah, finally done fantasizing about Yoji?"  
Schuldig paused, jolting Ken higher onto his back before his hands could lose their grip. Ken studied the white clouds forming around Schuldig's mouth, the arch of his thin brows, the thin wisps of silken fire protruding from under his dark green hat.   
Ken squiggled.   
"Let me down. I can walk now".  
Schuldig loosened his grip, hands falling to his sides. Ken slid down his back. Gloved hands still resting against his chest, forehead pressed against his shoulder as he tried to regain his balance. Ken held the embrace for much longer than was obviously necessary. With his ear pressed against Schuldig's back like this, he could hear the other man's heartbeat.   
Schuldig turned into the embrace so that he was now facing Ken. Ken's fingers were now laced loosely around his waist.   
Ken stared into the dark depths of the other's eyes, drawn like a moth to the flame. The cold no longer existed. There was only Schuldig.  
Hair drifting across his face, licking his jaw. Ken wanted to place his lips everywhere those fiery filaments touched.   
Schuldig reached up to cup Ken's face in his hands. He knew what Ken wanted. His eyes were easier to read than his mind.   
Schuldig pressed his lips fiercely against Ken's forehead.  
"Schuldig..."  
Ken was clutching at his arms, creasing the black leather.   
"You're...such an idiot...Ken," he breathed, whispering the words against Ken's skin.   
"Ken!"  
Schuldig pushed Ken away a respectable distance.  
Ran rushed forward; catching Ken in his arms as the frozen boy staggered forward a step. Wiry arms encircled Ken tightly, unyielding.  
"Yokatta..." he sighed into the younger boy's hair.   
Schuldig turned stiffly. Waving an arm nonchalantly as he headed back to the warmth of the cabin.  
"You take him the rest of the way Ran, my back hurts from carrying so much weight".  
Ken's eyes widened at this and his mind screamed at Schuldig for an explanation, a meaning to his ever confounding and cryptic comments.   
Ran held Ken a little tighter.  
Schuldig was already gone.   
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Tea & Popcorn

Red &White  
Ch.2 Tea & Popcorn  
by Lola  
A.N. Same as first chap. Though perhaps a bit lighter. ^_^ And no...I don't own Weiss or Schwarz.   
Gomen for taking so long. I'll try to hurry for the next chapter.   
  
"You're such an idiot Ken".  
Ken shook his head. Yes, an idiot. A complete an utter fool. Schuldig's words stung. Not that he wasn't used to being called an idiot. He had constantly been berated by Omi's disbelieving cries of "Ken, you're crazy!" on missions and Yoji's teasing and Ran's silent glares when he fumbled in the flower shop. So he was a bit reckless. A hothead perhaps. But wasn't that just a sign of how passionate he was? That he could just plunge into things without thinking? Wasn't that proof of his devotion?   
No one criticized Ran when he used to run about shouting "Takatori Shine!" as though it were some ancient Spartan war cry. Certainly no one raised a brow when Yoji sprouted a flower seemingly out of nothing to give to some girl that caught his fancy.   
Why did he always get all the jibes?   
He shifted in the sofa where he was sitting. The blanket that Ran had insisted on wrapping around him nearly suffocating him. He could hear Omi and Nagi in the next room watching television. Ran sat across from him, a book open in his lap as he devoured the words on the page.   
They were waiting for tea. Yoji said he'd bring it. What was taking so long? The silence was driving Ken insane. He rose.  
Ran's eyes followed him questioningly.   
"I think Yoji forgot about us," Ken explained as he shuffled towards the kitchen passing the t.v. room on the way.   
He paused in the doorway, his face reflecting white light from the screen. Nagi sat cross legged on the carpeted floor. Omi lying on his stomach beside the brown haired boy. What was that movie? An old American film. A Gene Kelly flick.   
Ken leaned against the doorway, momentarily transfixed by the old musical. Singing in the rain. That was it. And that was the song being sung at the moment. Omi stood, Nagi's dark blue eyes watching him, distracted from the movie by the form of the blond youth. Omi began to dance, mimicking Kelly.   
Before Nagi could protest, his hands were seized by Omi as the older boy spun the other around. Ken watched the boys dance. It was beautiful. Their bodies bathed in the white light from the screen, snow falling against the window. Graceful. That's what Omi's movements were. As killers they had to have perfect control over their bodies. Omi was no exception.  
Ken wanted to watch their dance forever.  
He nearly jumped when a large bowl of popcorn appeared in front of him. Butter and salt oozing between the puffed kernels.   
Beside him, equally transfixed, a mop of orange hair and jade eyes.  
"Schul-"  
'Shh...don't disturb them.'  
Ken glanced back at the boys who were now holding each other at arms length and spinning revelling in the dizzying feeling of blurred vision and loud laugher.   
'You envy their happiness don't you?'  
Ken didn't need to answer, it was plain to Schuldig, known before the thoughts had even formed coherently in Ken's mind.   
Ken turned away as Omi released Nagi and they both fell onto the carpet, breathing heavily. Slender chests heaving. He grabbed a handful of popcorn, watching Schuldig in amusement as the German, having his hands full holding the bowl, bent his head down, stuck out his tongue and lightly touched a fluffy popped kernel. Curling his tongue back, he brought the delicious morsel into his mouth.   
'You're drooling kitten'.  
Ken wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, a flush spreading across his cheeks. Ken remembered the tea.   
He started in the direction of the kitchen, hoping to get his tea before Yoji forgot about it and it turned cold. Schuldig stepped in front of him. Blocking him with his body.   
"Now's not the time to go in there," his voice, nasal yet sexy whispered in Ken's ear.  
Before Ken could form the question of why, a dozen quick images flashed through his head.   
Yoji.  
Crawford.  
A tangle of long limbs.  
A flash of skin. Yoji's toned abdomen.  
Fingers digging into loose sandy waves.  
Bodies pressed together in urgency. Yoji's back bending over the table, Crawford's fingers sliding under the other man's black crop top.   
Ken leaned against the wall, breathing heavily for a long moment as the images swirled around delectably in his mind for a few more seconds before Schuldig gently took them away.   
Ken tilted his head back against the wood of the wall.  
"Is that...is that why the dishwasher is on? To mask the...uh...noise?"  
As he asked this his fingers closed over Schuldig's own, gently sliding the bowl of popcorn from the German's grasp.   
"I wanted my tea," Ken spoke quietly.  
Schuldig's eyes brightened for a moment, "So did I".  
'This is how our friendship began. We met over tea and popcorn'.  
'I remember...Ken'.  
********  
A quiet shopping mall. A warm Sunday afternoon. Ken walked down the aisles, blue basket slung over one arm. Eyes roaming over items, scoffing at prices. Laughing for the millionth time at the fact that there was actually a product called Poccari Sweat.   
Surrounded by cheerful clerks and the ever present greeting of "Irashaimase!". Ken nodded and moved down the aisle for teas. He couldn't smile at the clerks. Not today. Not after what Aya had said.  
All Ken wanted was to get a little closer to the man he loved. So he had tried to hug the man. Aya hadn't pushed him away. He even held Ken back for a fleeting instant and in that moment Ken had thought that maybe, just maybe things would be ok. But then Aya had pried Ken's arms away. Hardly gentle. And then Ken had seen those eyes.  
Cold. So cold.  
Not even a glimmer of warmth.  
"We are friends Ken. Nothing more".  
Ken could feel his chest tightening, it was difficult to breathe but somehow words blurted from his lips.  
"But just now...you...you hugged me back!" He moved to grab Aya's shoulders but the man stepped out of reach.   
The toss of red hair, golden earring glittering against the white skin of his neck.  
"I thought that's what you wanted. To be held by me." Dark eyes too purple to be anything but something from a fantasy swept over Ken.  
Ken swallowed.  
"Was I wrong?"  
"NO! It's just that...I want more. And for a second I believed you did too but-"  
"I don't." Aya finished curtly.   
He nodded once, then turned on his heel, hard heeled boots connecting loudly against the pavement, long trenchcoat swaying with the movement of his slender hips.   
"But, I...I love you!" Ken's eyes widened at his own confession, his stomach tightened, nervous.  
Ken never heard a harsher sound than that of Aya's footsteps fading away. The man didn't even flinch. His voice reached Ken's ears. It took a moment to decipher the words carried from Aya's lips on the wind.  
Ken sank to his knees on the pavement.  
"I can't say I feel the same. Your feelings are misplaced".  
Ken shook his head as his fingers closed around a package of mint tea, Aya's favorite. Ken eyed his hand for a moment as though it had betrayed him. He put the package back with a sigh.   
If I keep thinking like this I'm gonna start crying in this damn store!   
His fingers reached over for a another flavour of tea, Orange Pekoe, western tea. As he turned from the aisle, his forehead rammed into someone's muscled shoulder. He staggered back falling against the aisle of teas, random boxes and packages raining down around him as he landed on his posterior.   
A strong hand offered support.  
Ken raised his eyes to examine the man leaning over him. He gasped and scrambled in a comical attempt to escape, tea bags and fallen boxes tripping him.   
A wide smirk. A cigarette tucked behind one ear. Long orange hair tied back, green tinted glasses hanging from an open necked shirt matching the knee length jacket.   
"What are you doing here?!" Ken finally asked, still on the floor, though now crouching defensively.   
The tall German laughed, or rather cackled. He patted the basket hanging from one arm and then gestured around at the items displayed along the shelves.  
"Shopping for treats Hidaka. Why else would I be in a grocery store?"  
Somehow the thought of a member of Schwartz going grocery shopping just didn't seem plausible. There had to be some alterior motive.   
"You're right. Usually we order our food, but Crawford never orders my favorite kind of popcorn or," he paused to snatch a pack of tea, the brand Ken had just taken, "my favorite tea."  
Ken glanced at the man's basket. Sure enough. Popcorn and tea. And a package of star sugar. Ken couldn't resist a laugh at this.   
Schuldig offered his hand, he seemed to be unarmed.  
'To the untrained eye'.  
Ken shrugged and seized the man's hand. The touch was brief. Ken thought of Aya.  
The German turned to leave.  
Ken grabbed the elbow of his jacket. "Wait".  
"What?"  
Ken looked away, flustered. "Aren't you gonna attack me or something?"  
'I don't want to be alone', Ken's mind practically screamed at Schuldig.   
The movement was quick. Ken never had the time to react. His wrist was seized and he was dragged out of the store.   
A car door opened, he was guided inside. He fastened his seatbelt without thinking. The engine roared. Ten minutes on the road. Buildings speeding by.   
Ken blinked.  
"Where are you taking me?"  
Schuldig never took his eyes off the road, "Where you want to go".  
********  
Ken ran a hand through his hair. "You knew about Ran then didn't you?"  
"I did".  
The creak of a floorboard. A shift in the current of air as Ken moved. Jade eyes followed the deliberate movements. The popcorn bowl placed carefully on the floor. Another step forward.   
Schuldig knew what was coming.  
He waited.  
His tongue ran over his lips in anticipation.  
Ken's hands in his hair. He closed his eyes. A tingle of pleasure as Ken's body pressed closer, his nose nudging gently at his chin.   
"I never did get to thank you".  
Schuldig shivered. Ken's voice was almost breathless. Caressing his face in hot waves.   
"Twice you came to my rescue," his lips whispered against his neck.  
Teeth crazed Schuldig's adam's apple. Fingers sliding up his back as it arched into the touch.   
The sound of material falling to the floor. The blanket which Ran had wrapped around Ken.   
Schuldig felt feverish. Ken's hand was cupped at the back of his neck, a slight pressure. The German couldn't resist lowering his head. He ran the back of his fingers across Ken's flushed cheeks.   
Ken was actually going to let him kiss him. The German was certain of it. He could practically already taste the man. He was going to go through with it, even though...  
Even though he loved Ran.  
Too fast. Ken didn't have a chance.  
One second warmth of Schuldig's body.  
The next, his palms were pressed against the cold wall.   
He whipped his head around, shaggy bangs falling into his eyes. Schuldig was about to enter the kitchen.  
"I'm getting our tea kitten. I've waited long enough".  
Ken stared at where Schuldig had been moments before.   
"Ken? Daijobu ka?"  
Ran.  
Purple eyes swept over Ken. The crumpled blanket. The deserted bowl of popcorn. Flushed cheeks, trembling hands.   
Pale fingers slid over Ken's forehead.  
A sigh. Was that relief? Such a strange sound coming from such a cold man.  
"No fever".  
Ken closed his eyes. So close. But Schuldig knew. He knew his thoughts had been of Ran. Damn it! Despite everything he had done, he just couldn't forget. Ran knelt, grabbing the blanket and wrapping it snugly around Ken's shoulder's oncemore. The pressure of Ran's flat palm pressed against the small of Ken's back, guiding him back to the living room where the leader of Weib had been reading.  
********  
Schuldig entered the kitchen just as Crawford was feeding Yoji a piece of chocolate cake. Yoji licked his lips slowly. The American's eyes followed the motion as he leaned back against the counter. Waiting.  
Yoji made a show of swallowing in pleasure. Schuldig rolled his eyes.  
"Delicious as always Bradley".  
Before the scene could play anymore on inuendos, Schuldig cleared his throat and elbowed his way between the two. He was hardly in the mood for Yoji's sultry speech or Crawford's all knowing smirks.   
"Oh would you two just go to your room already?" He growled as he snatched his mug of tea from the counter.   
Crawford raised a brow.  
Green eyes narrowed. "What? Don't pretend like you didn't see that coming".  
Yoji placed the other boys' tea mugs on a tray and deftly leaned it against one bony hip, supporting it with one hand as the other flicked his ever present shades down to perch at the tip of his nose.   
"Don't be a bitch Schuldig".   
Hips swivelled, dark blue eyes following the sway of the tight pants closely.   
Crawford began cutting the cake methodically in pieces for the rest of the group.   
"So?"  
"What?"  
"Are you having cake?" Crawford asked blandly.  
Schuldig couldn't help but smirk, sometimes Brad could really make a situation so mundane seem utterly amusing. Or maybe I just need a cigarette so badly that I've become delirious with desire and thus my mind is too far gone to realize that this isn't funny at all. The flame haired German arched his eyebrow, "Only if you feed it to me mein mann".  
"So that's a no then".  
Long fingers removed Crawford's silver rimmed glasses. Eyelashes lowered. Hands toying with the buttons of a tailor made shirt. Orange contrasted with ebony, like a wild fire flaring wildly against a backdrop of the night sky. A whisper stirring the short hairs near Crawford's ear.   
"I'm not hungry for cake...".  
The leader of Schwarz pushed passed coolly, readjusting his glasses as he prepared to take the cake into the other room. He didn't turn.  
"Either smoke a cigarette or sleep with Ken. Just do one of them soon because you're a real nuisance when you don't obey your hedonistic addictions."  
Schuldig threw his head back and laughed. Yes, he would need to give in to desire soon. He patted himself down. Searching half-heartedly. Nothing.  
'Yoooooooojiiiiiiii?'  
The blond furrowed his brow as the nasal voice jarred through his thoughts.  
'What Schuldig?'  
'Got any cigarettes?'  
'You said you were quitting.'  
The German smiled. 'True enough'.  
He ran his hands quickly through his untamed mass of hair, letting it spray across his shoulders. Running his fingers over the silver studs on his black leather belt he paused, one hand on his hip, staring at the reflection cast back at him from the window. A feral grin.  
He tilted his head to the side before strutting out of the kitchen. He had a fixation to deal with. And...  
Ken was waiting.   
********  
Well that's the end of Chapter Two. It isn't what it should be...but that'll be for the next chapter. Here's a hint, there will be dancing and maybe even *gasp* a naked Schu!!! Stay tuned. Let me know what you think ne? Onegai!!  
Mwah ha hahahahahahah! Aren't I evil leaving you all hanging like that? Well, my apologies I actually had planned for something else but...well this story is taking a life of it's own and like I said, it's probably gonna be really long. -_-   
Also it wasn't as long as my first chapter. Gomen.   
Thanks to all who wrote to me and took the time to review. *Takes deep breath* Ahem. So big thanks to *trumpet fanfare* : Zu (You know I love you sugarbee), Truth, Chibi-chan, Switch, Ari, Cha, Siberian, Cassie, Lissa, Chibi Pluto, LN Tora, Chibi-Sana, Rose, Arcina, Swythangel, and Nataku's Ribbon. You guys are the best, so I just thought you should know that ^_^!! Arigatou Gozaimasu!!!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	3. Breaking Down Resistance

Red & White

by Lola

Ch3: Breaking down resistance.

Ken stared at Omi's back in fascination. The blond sat at the piano in the corner, fingers dancing across ivory keys expertly. A soft melody. Supple movement of wrists and long fingers. The song played on. Crawford had requested Omi play. 

Now they all relaxed with their tea and cake, listening to Omi's piece by Tchaichovsky [1]. 

"Omi-chan, when did you learn to play piano?" Yoji voiced the question which lingered in Ken's mind. 

A shrug.

Nagi turned the page so Omi's fingers could follow. 

"I don't really know. I've been playing since I can remember. Persia paid for the lessons. I guess he figured I shouldn't miss out on a proper upbringing just because Takatori abandoned me."

Nagi frowned at this.

"It's beautiful".

Omi's smile reflected off the polished surface of the piano, "Arigatou Ken-kun".

Trails of smoke curled from Yoji's lips, casting a dream like haze throughout the room. Violet eyes stared intently at Ken. The brunette lowered his eyes, wondering where Schuldig was. 

Ran leaned his head back, exposing his slender white neck. Eyes closed. Lost in the music. 

A stir of movement. Crawford stood. He held Yoji's gaze a moment before retreating to his room. Another fleck of ash in the crystal tray. A practiced twist of the wrist, one last cloud of smoke exhaled slowly, the cigarette is crushed into the sparkling glass. 

Yoji followed.

Was it love that compelled Yoji to go to Crawford's room every night? Ken looked down into his mug of tea. Probably not. Yoji didn't let sentimental things like love get in the way of having a good time. Love brings pain. Yoji had enough of that with Asuka. And Crawford certainly was too practical to feel love. Why bother with the sentiment when you can just get the sex without any of the effort. 

Why indeed? 

Ken sighed, he had never been a practical man. 

A sudden slip of the fingers, a jarring note. Ken looked up sharply, Ran raised a slender brow.

Nagi had placed his hands on Omi's shoulders momentarily startling the boy. The song resumed. Nagi leaned down, his breath fluttering in Omi's ear. 

"Shall we play a duet?"

A shiver ran down Omi's spine.

His lips parted slightly, his voice was almost a pant, "Gomen Nagi-kun, demo, I don't know how".

Nagi closed his eyes. Letting his hands slide down Omi's shoulders. Gliding down his arms until they rested over Omi's own. 

"Let me guide you".

Omi leaned his head back against the younger boy's shoulder. Nagi's power coursed through both their bodies, guiding Omi's fingers. Hearts beating wildly, chests rising and falling with every powerful crescendo. Blue eyes half-closed, Omi stared upward in what could have been interpreted as an expression of sheer ecstasy. Nagi's heartbeat matched his own. He could feel it, the younger boy's chest pressed against his back. Beating in time with the seductive waltz. One song. One rhythm. 

Sweat beaded on Nagi's forehead, his brow furrowed in concentration. He buried his head in the curve of Omi's neck where it met his shoulder. 

Ken felt dizzy. Like the song they were playing was a drug. Nagi was sending out some powerful vibes and probably didn't even know it so absorbed was he in the music. Intermingling with the mist from Yoji's cigarettes, the dim light, the residual taste of chocolate. Too much. He blinked slowly. 

His movements felt slow, restrained almost. 

His head lolled to the side.

A blur of red and white. 

Ran stood over him. Leaning down. One arm, deliciously bare and gleaming like marble in the dimmed light, extended toward him. 

Ken's hands slid into Ran's. 

A slight tug.

Ken staggered forward, closer to Ran. 

Ken let Ran lead. He had one hand on the redhead's shoulder, the other was clasped in Ran's own. There was a distance between them as the hand on Ken's waist gently swerved their bodies in circular patterns around the room. The distance allowed their eyes to meet. Ran stared. Expressionless. Ken's mouth hung open slightly as they spun, Ran's eyes flicking down momentarily to ensure that their movements were smooth. 

Ran's gold earring glinted as he tilted his head to the side, red ear tail spilling like ink on the black canvas that was his shirt, a stark contrast to the white skin of his neck. Ken watched in helpless fascination as Ran raised their joined hand to his lips and kissed his knuckles briefly. Eyes never parting from Ken's. 

Another spin.

The room seemed to swirl before Ken's eyes.

Someone was watching him. 

Over Ran's shoulder. His eyes widened. 

In the entrance, standing out in the darkness from the hallway, Schuldig. 

One eyebrow slightly raised. Arms crossed in feigned indifference. Long titian hair falling in silken ribbons on his white sweater. Ken wanted to bury his head in that sweater. How soft it looked. How strong the arms beneath seemed as the muscles strained against the wool. 

He leaned his head on Ran's shoulder instead. Forehead pressed against the curve of Ran's neck. He could feel the telepath's eyes burning into his back. Could see that slanted smirk, mocking him. The smug smirk which never reached his eyes. 

His eyes. Cold jade. Betrayed. 

_'Good night Ken'._

Ken looked over Ran's shoulder desperate to catch one last glimpse of those eyes. But he heard the footsteps leading up the stairs. 

His shoulders sagged in defeat. Why didn't Schuldig believe him? Damn it the man could read his mind, he knew that Ken wanted to be dancing with him, wanted to be held in his arms, yet he still walked away. Why? 

Ran mistook Ken's sudden sombreness to be a result of exhaustion. He stepped back. Soft fingers tilted Ken's chin upward.

Ken found himself staring into the most beautiful face known to man. Purple eyes darkened in concern and something else....

A slight flush adorned the redhead's cheeks, probably from the dancing. Or was it from the wine with supper? 

Ken was being led up the stairs, hardly aware of his body's movement. He let Ran lead him to his room. Ran guided him to the bed in the darkness. Gentle hands pushed on Ken's shoulders. Something hit the back of his knees. He instinctively fell back on the bed. 

He closed his eyes.

Ran's weight settled atop his.

Wordlessly, Ran began running his fingers under Ken's sweater. Ken held his breath, stomach sucked in. Reeling from sensation. Ran's mouth on his. 

Why was this happening? Why couldn't he stop it? Because Ran is all you ever wanted. 

A sigh escaped the brunette's lips. Hair spun from ruby tickled his chin. Teeth and tongue marking the territory of his neck. Ran shifted his weight, firmly pinning the younger man in order to ensure that he couldn't escape as if sensing his hesitation. 

"Stop..."the words mumbled against his leader's lips and forcefully hushed a moment later by a harder kiss.

Ken turned his face to the side, avoiding those hungry lips. He planted his palms on Ran's chest, shocked momentarily by the frantic beat of the older man's heart. He bit his lip. Ran's fingers questing, teasing under his sweater.

"Ran, please".

He pushed.

Ran relented. Sliding his hands down Ken's chest as he sat back on his heels. Ken sat up on his elbows unable to do any more than that since Ran still sat on him lightly but firmly holding him in place. 

Red bangs shadowed his eyes.

"I want to take a shower".

Ran nodded and swung one leg over Ken letting him go. The former J-League star stood shakily, frightened at how close he and Ran had just come to...to...if Ken hadn't stopped him.

His slippered feet trudged to the door, his face red.

Ran caught his wrist. 

"I want _you_ Ken".

Brown eyes widened. He nodded quickly before practically running out the door and locking himself in the bathroom.

He let out a long shaky breath. 

Vanilla.

He glanced about the bathroom with a start. That scent. Schuldig. The German must have taken a shower before going to bed. Ken's cheeks flushed at the thought. The scent of Schuldig was everywhere. Damn his vanilla body wash! 

Ken closed his eyes as he let his back slide down the door until he sat on the cold ceramic tiles. One hand held to his forehead. The other resting on his thigh. 

A muffled sob.

Another tear.

Another sleepless night. 

********

Ken entered his room with a yawn. Hair wet, towel slung over his slender hips carelessly. Water still sliding down his chest and arms. Curving around every muscle.

He shook his head, letting the droplets spray in the darkness. Wet bangs clung to his forehead.

He padded towards the window where moonlight spilled onto the carpet. Frost glittered on the glass. Ken dragged a finger over the crystal formations. His fingers left wet streaks, melting the frost. Feeling like a child, he began to write on the window. First his own name, then with a tiny smile, Schuldig's. 

He paused, palm pressed against the window, hollow eyes stared back at him. Through the snow which melted against the window, a vision of red. Ran. Ran holding him in the snow. His cold cheek pressed against Ken's ear. 

Ken turned away from the moonlight, fingers blurring the words he had inscribed as he did so. 

He froze.

Across the room, blue light pooled across long tanned limbs and reflected seductively off orange hair. The customary head band was gone leaving his wild hair to cascade freely down his bare shoulders and lick at his chest. The head band wasn't the only thing missing Ken soon realized as he quickly looked away, cheeks burning.

"Umm...." Ken desperately wanted to ask the German what in all the hells was he doing in his room in the middle of the night, stark naked of all things, but somehow all he could do is sputter and cough. 

Unashamed, for how could anyone with such a fine physique ever be embarrassed of their body, the German swung his legs over the bed and swivelled his narrow hips towards Ken. 

His footsteps muffled by the carpet. Not that Ken could have heard anything over the pounding of his heart. He tried desperately to swallow the rising lump in his throat as Schuldig drew nearer, eyes avoiding his nakedness.

"I sleep this way kitten," he purred, one hand reaching up to caress Ken's flushed cheek. 

Ken could have sworn he was seeing stars, he turned his eyes timidly towards the flame haired man. 

"Don't you get c-cold?"

A lazy smirk curled its way onto Schuldig's lips, "Do I _feel_ cold to you?" 

Ken whimpered as he was pressed against the window, pinned firmly in place by Schuldig's body. The only obstacle between them, Ken's flimsy towel which he noted with a growing panic, was riding a little too low on his hips for comfort and felt as though it would slip to the carpet at any second. 

The window fogged quickly at the proximity of their heated bodies.

"I've come to finish what you started".

Before Ken could protest, Schuldig had him on the floor, one arm pinned at each side of his head. Schuldig's untamed hair fell down around Ken's face in a fiery curtain. Ken gritted his teeth and waited for the inevitable. 

And waited.

He could hear Schuldig's rapid breaths.

He cracked an eye open warily. Then blinked in shock. Schuldig looked away, glad for the darkness which shielded the emotion in his eyes. Slowly, his hands released their vice grip on Ken's wrists.

He rose. 

Ken was left staring at his naked back as he went to look out the window. He propped himself up on his elbows.

"Schuldig?" he asked uncertainly, and mentally added _'What's going on?'_.

"You tell me Ken".

"Hey you're the one who showed up naked in my room!" Ken sputtered, then flushed remembering his encounter with Ran. So much for his cold shower he thought as he glanced back at Schuldig's gleaming back. 

Schuldig smirked at his reflection, "You still love Ran?"

Ken stared at him in puzzlement. Did it matter? 

"No," he answered quietly.

Schuldig spun around, grabbing Ken by the neck and lifting him. A quick toss. Ken lay breathless on his bed, the warmth of Schuldig's body still lingering in the blankets.

"Liar".

"What?"

Jade eyes laughed mockingly. The German reached out as if to caress the former soccer player only to flick him hard in the forehead instead.

Ken stared in shock, was this Schuldig's idea of foreplay? Name calling and childish abuse?

"Don't flatter yourself Ken."

Large eyes darted about in the darkness. Lost. 

"I can read your mind Ken remember? I know you still love Ran."

Ken flushed. Eyes darkening in anger. "If you know then why the hell did you ask?!"

Ken rose and shoved Schuldig back a step. "If you can read my mind then why didn't you when I was dancing with Ran? Where were you then? Did you know that my thoughts were of you? If you know what I'm thinking then why bother asking if you don't believe me!" 

Ken looked away, afraid of meeting the other's eyes. "Yes, Schuldig, you can read my mind, hell it's probably not that hard," his eyes flicked to the redhead's face tentatively, his expression softened, "but you can't read my heart".

Schuldig rocked back a step.

"Ken..." his voice was husky.

Ken shivered.

Ken didn't have to say anything else. Fingers laced at the back of his neck, pulling him close. Schuldig held Ken tightly, not caring if the man broke in his arms.

Lips found their way to Ken's neck. He tilted it, allowing easier access. Schuldig felt fingers in his hair. 

"When you ran into the snow, and...when I saw you with...with Ran..."the German couldn't continue, prefering instead to lavish kisses down Ken's neck, his chest, nipping at a shoulder, fingers sliding beneath Ken's towel, pulling him closer. 

A startled gasp.

Schuldig smirked.

"Wait...I don't want-"

"Hmm...you're body tells me different kitten".

Red cheeked and confused as hell, Ken struggled out of Schuldig's grasp. 

The red head's eyes narrowed as he stalked forward, cornering his prey. Ken was momentarily frightened by the predatory gleam in those green eyes. But this was his friend right? He wouldn't do anything if Ken wasn't ready....

"Don't count on it," he breathed hungrily.

Ken was tackled, his body pinned once more to the bed. Vaguely he wondered how often this scene was going to play out with him tonight.

Schuldig smoothed the wet hair away from Ken's face.

"I want to see your eyes".

Ken lay still, unable to breathe. Schuldig's mouth hovered over his uncertainly. His stomach tightened in anticipation. 

Light flooded the room.

"Ken, daijo-"

Ran's voice smooth as melted chocolate faltered and cracked at the sight he beheld in the room. Moonlight glinted off the German's backside as he crouched over a prone Ken, still wet from the shower. 

Violet eyes strayed from the German's nakedness to Ken's flushed face and wide eyes.

"I heard a commotion. I thought...gomen".

Ran's footsteps faded. 

********

[1] Sorry his name is probably spelled wrong but I was to lazy to check the spelling *grins*

A.N.: Well...that's the end of part three!! Huzzah! I know this part wasn't that great but...*sigh* at least it's done ne? Thanks again to those who reviewed chapter 2, Yukiko-chan, Ochiba, Lily-chan :), Cha(doumo arigatou), and watashino Oneesan!! *sniffle* I love you guys, you make my day. ^_^


	4. Restless

Red & White

by Lola

Chapter 4: Restless

Two bodies shifted in the dark, tangling in the silken sheets. The only sound, the rustling of blankets, the sound of skin sliding against skin. Soft gasps and moans. 

Fingers slithered through short black hair.

Golden brown waves splashed onto the pillow. 

"Hmm, you're distracted".

Yoji blinked.

He slid his arms down Crawford's back, settling to flatten above the curve of his backside. 

"Why do you say that?"

The American leaned back for a moment, he studied those sultry lips, the eyes glittering with charisma and mischief. 

"You're thinking of someone else."

Yoji's lips curled into that all too familiar half-smile, "Jealous?"

"Kiss me".

That wasn't a request.

Yoji reached up, forcing Crawford's head down, and claimed the ebony-haired man's lips. It was brief, without passion. Obeyed mechanically like any other order. 

Crawford rolled off the other man, "Get out".

"What?"

"I will not repeat myself Kudoh".

Yoji frowned slightly but slid out of the bed nonetheless. He dressed quickly. His hand closed over the doorknob. He turned it slowly. Turning back one last time to see Crawford's back.

"Don't you even care why I'm distracted?" his voice was low, tired.

"No".

"Tch."

Yoji slammed the door.

********

Ken stood on the balcony. It was cold. But it was better than facing the ice in Ran's eyes or fending off the German's wandering hands. The sky was clearing up. The stars winked down at him. 

The door behind him slid open.

A warm jacket was tossed loosely over his shoulders. Yoji stepped out onto the balcony. 

They eyed each other for a moment.

A flare in the dark of winter.

Smoke curled from Yoji's mouth. "Problems with the redheads?" he asked as he offered the cigarette to Ken.

A quick nod, as cold fingers brushed against Yoji's to bring the burning tobacco to his lips. Green eyes watched, amused. Ken took a long drag.

"You?"

The lanky blond nodded his assent. 

Ken smirked as he looked up into the stars, "What'd Crawford do? Deny you sex?"

"Yes".

Ken had intended that as a joke but hearing Yoji answer so solemnly in affirmation was...was...

He turned to stare at his friend. Yoji reclaimed his cigarette. Rolling it thoughtfully between his thumb and index finger before letting it dangle from his lips.

Ken burst out laughing, leaning his hands on the railing to steady himself, the cold metal bar freezing his fingers and palms. 

"That's it?" He wheezed between chuckles.

"Hey this is serious!" Yoji protested though he was also smiling as he punched Ken lightly. 

Ken blew on a patch of snow, watching the flakes diminish into hot droplets of water before melting into the darkness. 

"Wanna talk about it?"

Yoji sighed, and flicked the ash off his cigarette with a flick of his thumb.

"Nothing really to talk about..."

Ken waited. 

Yoji ran a hand through his unkempt locks trying to give them some semblance of uniform flow. Crawford had ruffled them quite a bit. 

He took a deep breath, "He had a vision while we were...um...occupied. Anyway, he muttered your name, so I wanted to know what he had seen. I was worried, well after you ran away earlier, I figured you might be in danger or something."

He looked to see if Ken was following. Two large brown eyes blinked twice owlishly, before his head bopped once in a sign of encouragement. 

"When Crawford refused to tell me what he had seen, I was suspicious but remained silent. But I was distracted." He let out a dry laugh, "Let's just say that I couldn't quite focus on him and he wasn't pleased".

"Gomen".

Yoji frowned. "Doushite?"

Ken shivered. "You were worried about me. It's my fault ne?" He turned sad lonely eyes to Yoji and the older man's heart throbbed in sympathy with the pain which dimmed the usual light in that chocolate gaze. 

He bowed his head. "I seem to have single handedly ruined four men's night". 

Yoji winced.

"Saa...daijobu Ken, don't worry about it. Crawford just needs some time to cool down."

He flicked his cigarette into the snow, watching the red ember flash through the night air before fizzling out in the endless blanket of white. 

"Well, you've heard my sob story, now what's _your_ excuse for being out in this blasted cold Kenken?"

A quiet resigned sigh, "Ran walked in on me and Schuldig in a rather compromising position..."

Yoji raised his brows, he let a grin flash briefly as he nudged Ken gently in the ribs, "You wild man Ken, I didn't know you had it in you!"

Cheeks flushed, "Nothing happened!"

"Ah, so that's the problem".

"Yes! No!" he threw up his hands in frustration, wishing he had something to punch, "I don't know...".

"Careful Kenken, you're playing with fire with those two".

Ken sighed, "Why is everything so complicated Yotan? Why do we have to grow up?"

"Shirimasen [1]...demo, we didn't have a choice. Death and sin has touched us all in a way that will forever bar us from the innocence of childhood. This is reality. This is the life of an assassin."

Ken hugged himself, rubbing his fingers over the rough leather of his jacket, "I hate it".

Long arms encircled Ken. The two friends stood in the gathered snow on the balcony, clinging to each other for warmth and understanding in a world that would never forgive them for their sins. 

"Ne...Yotan?" his voice muffled against the tweed of Yoji's navy ankle length coat.

Yoji murmured his attention.

"Do you think it's possible to be in love with two people?"

Tanned fingers ran through Ken's wild mop of hair. "I hope so." 

Brown eyes shyly looked up at his friend, watching the hurt flit across his face with the memory of Asuka. Ken sighed. His arms tightening around the taller man's waist momentarily.

"Me too".

********

Schuldig emerged from the washroom after a very very cold shower. He padded down the hallway, past Ran's room, past Ken's. Absently tangling his fingers in his damp orange hair, trying to get the wet knots out. He paused by Yoji's open door. His palm flattened against the wood as he pushed it open wider, allowing light from the hall to stream into the room. 

He squinted in the darkness, stumbling over one of Yoji's shoes. His eyes swept over the unoccupied bed to the night table...

"Wunderbar!!" [2]

The German's hands shook with barely concealed delight as he reached for the pack of cigarettes resting invitingly on the night table. He brought the package up to his nose and inhaled deeply. The familiar comfort of tobacco flooding his senses. Fingers fumbled to flip open the pack. 

Empty.

Schuldig's lips thinned in a grimace of disgust and annoyance. His fist clenched. The package crumpled. 

"What are you doing?"

The cardboard slipped between his fingers, landing with a soft plop on the carpet.

Crawford stood in the doorway, leaning against the frame, arms crossed over his bare chest.

"Trying to obey your command oh great leader".

His hips swivelled, two longs strides closer, facing the American squarely. "Now. Where does your boy toy keep his cigarettes love?"

"Far from the devil's greedy paws," Crawford answered evenly. "And don't call me 'love'".

_'You didn't even deny that he was your boy toy love. Tsk tsk.'_

Crawford pinched the bridge of his nose, he could sense a headache brewing. _'Schuldig...'_

Schuldig cackled, the sound echoing in Crawford's mind, only to be easily blocked and shoved back out.

The German crossed his arms, "You're no fun Bradley".

The redhead started to push past the man, then froze when he got a stray thought of Ken's. It wasn't quite coherent. Just a kind of sad acceptance of something. He closed his eyes. His brow furrowed slightly as he tuned into Ken's thought patterns, trying not to be obtrusive. He just wanted to see. Experience what Ken was feeling. 

His body jolted as Ken inhaled the cigarette. The desired taste of tobacco on Ken's lips, flooding his mind, feeling like a lover's caress to Schuldig's own.

A low groan of pleasure as the man crumpled against the wall, Crawford's hands keeping him from falling. Schuldig leaned into the American. Hands slid over the man's chest, needing to feel skin warm against his own. 

"Brad..." the name was breathed out slowly to match the movement of the redhead's hips as they slid up the other's legs. The silk pyjama pants clinging to his body. Crawford cupped one hand behind the German's neck. 

"You'll regret this".

Schuldig smirked as he lay his lips briefly on Crawford's collarbone, "I know".

Their kiss was fierce, born of anger, frustration and unrequited desire. A slight hesitation as they grew accustomed to each other's lips and movements, as they once had in the past. 

Teeth tugged at the American's earlobe. Warm palms sliding over broad shoulders. Crawford bent a little at he knee, Schuldig wrapped his arms tightly around his neck and jumped. Hands curved around the German's ass as he wrapped his long legs around his former lover's trim waist. 

Schuldig was dumped onto Yoji's bed without ceremony. He looked up at the man hovering over him. Eyes dark with desire. Desire for a tall lanky blond. Crawford's lips descended, closing over Schuldig's. He sighed.

_'Neither of us wants this mein mann'._

'Speak for yourself'.

Schuldig's fingers snapped the waist band of Crawford's pants, "That's not for me love".

Crawford pulled back from the kiss ever so slowly, dragging Schuldig's mouth after him. 

"Since when do you care about the details?"

Schuldig reached up, tenderly brushing ebony strands away from the oracle's forehead, revelling in the darkness of those blue eyes which once held desire only for him. But that's all it had been. Carnal desire. Schuldig had been, hell still was, a hot piece of ass and Brad had wanted in. And what Brad wants....

The German kissed the tip of his nose playfully, "Since you fell in love".

"Schu-"

Crawford was silenced by another kiss, soft, a kiss of farewell, one that he had never had the chance to give. 

Schuldig smiled, "Go get your man Brad."

Crawford nodded solemnly offering a hand to his friend as he rose, "Hm, but first, I need coffee, care to join me?"

Schuldig declined the offer claiming to have another date with the shower. They left the room, the redhead turning to enter the bathroom. A gentle touch at his elbow.

He raised an eyebrow.

"Brad?"

The American seemed uncertain, his cheeks were still flushed from their tryst a moment ago, "Just remember who left first".

A loud snort. "And better for you it was that I did!"

Crawford nodded and went down the stairs to brew some coffee. 

********

Cold water flowed down the German's body, curving around every muscle as he leaned forward, letting it cool his face. Hands planted on the white tile before him, eyes closed. He pushed back his long orange bangs with the back of one hand. If he didn't have a cigarette soon, he'd be in here all night or all day he mused as he glanced up at the window, noticing the silver light on the horizon. 

His bangs slid back into his eyes.

He left them, plastered to his forehead, obscuring his vision. 

Damn Ken.

So he shouldn't have pushed things when he knew the brunette wasn't ready. He should have just walked away. Then Ran wouldn't have seen and then Ken wouldn't have gotten upset. 

Now the brunette was probably angsting over how to explain things to the redhead. 

But Ken had just looked so...open.

Schuldig's fingers curled around the taps. The water slowed to a trickle then stopped. 

Now, he could go for some coffee. Or better yet, a nice frothy mug of beer.

********

Pale fingers closed around a silver spoon, stirring the dark brown liquid in the black mug. Dark eyes watched the scene on the balcony with a mix of anger and curiosity. Waiting. 

Yoji embracing Ken. Both oblivious to the world around them.

Footsteps.

A hand waved in front of his eyes. He swatted it away.

"What's got your attention?"

Cold droplets hit Crawford in the face as Schuldig swung his head around to follow the man's gaze. Just as Ken and Yoji entered from outside, bringing with them a blast of cold. 

Shivers ran along the redhead's arms and chest.

Yoji eyed Crawford warily. Ken let his arm slip from where it had been slung around Yoji's waist. 

Schuldig watched the silent war going on in the eyes of the two men. Ken seemed to looking for the best way to escape.

A sigh. Crawford rose. 

_'Don't say it mein freund'._

Crawford's eyes never left Yoji's.

_'They're just friends'._

A slight nod.

Without a word, Crawford walked over to the lanky assassin who stared at the man defiantly. In an intimate gesture that not only shocked Yoji but the two other men as well as the oracle himself, he leaned forward and kissed his forehead. Breathing in the scent of winter and smoke clinging to his bangs. He slid a hand into the other's, lacing their fingers together. As much of an apology as Crawford was capable of giving. 

Yoji brushed his thumb over the American's cheek, wiping away the cold drops from Schuldig's hair. 

The ebony haired man turned slightly, letting his gaze fall on Schuldig and Ken meaningfully, "Gentlemen...".

Ken blinked in confusion only to be quickly ushered out of the kitchen by the long haired German. 

Crawford turned his attention back to the handsome man standing before him. Yoji's mouth hung slightly open. Crawford kissed him fiercely.

"Brad..."

Crawford tossed his glasses onto the table. His hands slid up Yoji's chest, undoing the buttons of his coat one by one as he went along. Sliding the coat off of the tall man's shoulders, he lay it on the ceramic floor. Yoji was soon lowered gently onto his coat. Blond hair contrasting beautifully with the darkness of his coat. 

Crawford smoothed the hair away from his lover's face tenderly. 

"Brad...Ken and I-"

Yoji was silenced by another kiss. 

"Never mind that love, this," he paused as he trailed fingers along one of Yoji's legs, tongue and lips sliding under the man's jaw, "is about you," another pause, a nip at Yoji's chin, "and...me".

********

To be continued....

Gomen for cutting it off like that but if would've turned into a lemon and *blush* seeing as I'm already bright red I figured I should stop. And this is rated PG13 so....

[1] _Shirimasen_: I don't know

[2] _Wunderbar:_ German, means 'wonderful'. That was for you Zu ~.^

My thanks go out to Lily-chan *grins*, LN Tora, Chibi-chan, Koganei4 *gomen there wasn't any NagixOmi in this chapter*, Cherry, Ami-chan, Yukiko-chan, Dark Hunter, Swythangel *domo arigatou ^_^*, and Arcina. Thanks for your encouragement and for sticking with me even though I take forever...-_-'

And now for some words from our-Ack!

Schu: *throttles Lola* "You promised me Ken action!! And this is what I get? You take away my cigarettes and you don't give me Ken!!"

Lola: @_@ "Patience".

Lily: "Is virtue ne?"

Schu: "To hell with patience, I want my man love!!" *Schu shoves Lola away from the keyboard* "Now let me write this thing! I'll show you what all the fans want! Bwahahahahahahah!!"

Lola: *crumpled on the floor* "Tasukete!"

Lily: *wide eyed* "Man love?"

*Schu shoves Lily on the floor with Lola*

Lily: "Lo-chan your man is dangerous!"

Lola: *grins* "I know. That's why I love him". 


	5. Giving In

Ch.5: Giving In.

by Lola

A groan. The man twisted in his blankets. Tangling down filled comforters in long legs. Another quick twist. Hands forced a pillow over a mop of titian hair. Light still spilled across the pillow, setting fire to the strands which escaped the mound of blankets. 

Too early.

Damned too early.

And the voices.

Another groan, though more pitiful and subdued.

He had blocked out their thoughts yes, one had to if sleep of any kind was desired. But their voices!! The German gritted his teeth. Why were they so blasted loud at...at...

What the hell time was it anyway?

Puffy eyes poked out from the mass of feathered comfort.

Fingers latched onto a cold metal band. Letting the watch slide down his wrist, Schuldig squinted.

Silver hands ticked away around a white face of polished pearl.

"12:30?!"

A pause. Shutting his eyes as though he was actually debating rising from his cocoon. Nostrils flared briefly. Limbs stretch languidly only to curl back into the fetal position. 

Twenty more minutes wouldn't hurt...

And things seemed to have quieted downstairs, probably eating. A wiggle to further sink into the mattress, ensuring comfort. 

And then he heard the singing....

********

Ken stared. Baffled.

At his side, sat Omi and Nagi. Both sneaking glances at each other. There was a communication going on there. They reeked of tension. The current between them was strong enough to alert Ken and probably everyone else in the room, though they gave no indication. 

Yoji was busy at the stove, flipping an omelette in the frying pan, hips swaying to the songs he hummed. Currently it was his rendition of "It's raining men". Ken had never seen the man so at ease. While he'd always been composed, the epitome of nonchalance, he was never this...happy. Or content rather. Ken noted Crawford's eyes never straying from Yoji's hips and slender figure. Ken narrowed his eyes slightly and groaned inwardly. Perhaps it was simply, extreme satisfaction.

At least someone had a good night...

Crawford sipped his hazelnut coffee, made lovingly by Yoji of course, and turned the page of the newspaper he was reading. Ken fidgeted uncomfortably, feeling quite at a loss. Beside the two couples present, he felt alone. And strangely out of place. If only....

"You look like shit. What, were you run over by a car?"

Nagi's amused comment tossed at the newcomer drew Ken's attention.

Schuldig stood in the doorway of the kitchen.

Ken couldn't help but wince.

Tangled hair framed dark circled eyes glinting with a desire for murder. His face was pale and his posture betrayed a feeling of being drained. Schuldig eyed each one in turn, lingering pointedly on Yoji whose singing had dwindled to a hesitant humming.

Without a word or an attempt at an explanation, the sleep deprived man opened the fridge and pulled out the remains of the chocolate cake and a bottle of Heineken. Settling himself at the table facing the two teens, he stabbed at his cake savagely, ignoring the incredulous looks he received. 

Nagi opened his mouth for a quip but the German raised his hand abruptly, eyes closed, "Don't even think of saying it kid".

Omi raised an eyebrow, "Shouldn't you have some Tylenol with that? You know, breakfast of champions and all that."

"Nagi...tell you girlfriend to shut up".

Nagi frowned and Omi blushed. 

Ken watched the hurt mar Omi's usually happy countenance. "Schuldig....".

Ken's throat felt suddenly very tight when cold green eyes flashed in his direction. "Ken. Don't."

_'What? Does hurting Omi make you feel any better?'_

Schuldig let out a slow breath, trying to focus on the simple pleasure of the taste of chocolate in his mouth. 

_'Ken...Omi doesn't give a fuck what I think'._

Sensing Ken's disbelief form at the back of his mind, he let the brunette into the young blonde's mind for a brief glimpse of what preoccupied Omi's thoughts. Far from anything to do with Schuldig, they were mostly visions of Nagi, his mouth, fingers twining in dark hair, dilated pupils, the suppleness of a youth's body.

A smirk curved the German's lips as Ken's cheeks flushed.

Yoji sauntered over to the table, planting an omelette in front of Crawford along with a quick kiss on the man's lips.

Schuldig felt ill.

Ken felt awkward. There was too much tension. The two happy couples were driving Schuldig insane, that much was obvious. Whenever Omi and Nagi's fingers brushed followed by furtive glances and rose tinted cheeks or Yoji waggled his eyebrows in Crawford's direction while licking whichever utensil he held suggestively, Schuldig's eyebrow would twitch and his grip would tighten on his beer bottle. Knuckles whitening. Straining.

When Nagi brushed a strand of gold from Omi's eyes, Omi's perfect mouth forming a tiny "o" of pleasure, Schuldig's fist slammed into the table. Dishes rattled. Ken's glass of milk spilt across the polished surface of the table.

_'Ken.'_

Warm eyes met the German's. He flinched. Schuldig wiped at the pool of milk with a napkin, a slight tremor visible in his fingers.

_'Get out.'_

'What? Why?'

Schuldig tried to slow his breathing, but he was hungry. He needed....His eyes closed, refusing to glance in Ken's direction. 

_'Ken, if you don't leave the kitchen right now, I'm gonna fuck you right here on the table'._

Ken choked on his mouthful of toast.

Round eyes bewildered. He moved towards the sink, pouring himself a glass of water. Startled coughs still running like shudders down his spine. He jerked. Hands were rubbing his back in brisk circles. 

Breath still ragged, he peered over his shoulder. Fingers as white as marble closed around his arm and guided him back into a chair. Those same fingers lingered on his arm as dark eyes the royal shade of amethyst studied his face quietly, red brows slightly bent. Concern. Confusion.

Ken looked away. How could he meet such a gaze? There wasn't even a hint of anger, only a touch of sadness, shown in the slope of Ran's brow and the curve of his lips. Am I forgiven then? No...such a thing Ran could not forgive. He was not one to pardon betrayal but then again...Ken had always believed him to be incapable of any tender feeling as well. Something which the redhead seemed to be lavishing upon him magnanimously of late. 

Strange....

That pale hand slid down Ken's arm ever so slowly, savouring, settling on his thigh. Ken tensed. Stomach tightening. Ran's hand lay dormant on his thigh, not moving. A touch of concern, of possession.

The look he shot Schuldig illustrated his point quite lucidly. No one at the table missed it.

Mine.

Ran's eyes locked on Schuldig. A silent exchange, a mental sparring. 

A tiny gasp puffed from Ken's mouth. Pale fingers dug into his denim clad thigh. The wills of the two redheads clashed. 

Ran was strong. But Schuldig was a telepath. He knew the ethereal realm of mind games a hell of a lot better than Ran. Schuldig was also pissed as hell, the lack of nicotine and sex pushing past all reason. It would take effort to not snap Ran's mind and leave him a zombie. 

White teeth dug into Ken's bottom lip, staining it with a coat of blood. A bead of sweat formed on Ran's brow, sliding down his temple. Ken had long since lost circulation to his right thigh.

"Schuldig. That's enough. Let it go."

Crawford's voice so collected and even, a simple order. As Crawford commands so it is done. His eyes never left the newspaper he was reading. They didn't have to. One of the advantages of knowing the outcome of things. Ken marvelled at the oracle's confidence but was even more shocked when Schuldig obeyed. 

"Tch". The German stood, downing the rest of his beer in one swig. "You're lucky Crawford thinks you're pretty Ran or else you'd be brain dead right now," he paused, lips curling, feral, "I wonder if then your sister would take up your katana and start calling herself Ran."

Crawford sighed, an indication that he knew how this would turn out. 

Blood rushed through Ken's leg once more. Tossing his chair aside Ran sprang. Muscles taunt and ready. Schuldig was pinned roughly to the fridge. 

That taunting smirk still splayed across thin lips. Warm breath disturbing the long crimson bangs which hung over Ran's eyes. Ran swiped at his forehead in annoyance. He curled his fist, wanting nothing more than to crack the smug set of the German's jaw. 

A tug at the sleeve of his orange sweater. 

Ken never looked up, gaze firmly fixed on white tile. But his grip was firm. Ran let out a slow breath, fingers slowly loosening from the open collar of Schuldig's shirt. 

Schuldig brushed past the redhead, refusing to meet Ken's pleading stare. Snagging the rest of the pack of beer, he went upstairs. Not even offering a parting thought. 

Silence. Thick. Slumping Ken's shoulders and tightening Ran's lips into a thin line. Ken's fingers unfurled from the worn wool. 

Yoji let out a long stream of bluish smoke. "Ne, I thought _I_was the pretty one Bradley".

Crawford blinked, amused. Coiling an arm around the lanky man's waist he pulled him onto his lap, "Of course. The prettiest."

Before Yoji could respond, Nagi and Omi grabbed their cereal bowls and fled the scene, knowing all to well how this was going to progress. Ken walked out slowly, dazed. Wanting to go back to bed and start the day over again. A nod from Ran, switching on the radio on the counter as he moved to follow Ken out of the kitchen. 

Yoji blinked, "Saa, do you think we're getting to be too predictable?"

Crawford's laughter echoed off the tiles accompanying the humming of the radio, joined midway by Yoji's sultry chuckle.

******** 

Ken pushed aside the white translucent curtains, outside the living room window, Omi and Nagi were playing in the snow. Dancing about, careless. Rosy cheeked and full of energy. First Nagi was tackled to the snow, then Omi was pinned. Golden streaks flashing onto the white powder he was nestled in. Ken bit his lip. How free they seemed.

He didn't turn around at the muffled sound of deliberate footsteps. Didn't flinch as arms encircled his waist and teeth sunk into the tender flesh of his ear. He simply stared. 

Hands crawled up Ken's chest, palms curling over his shoulders as a warm body was pressed to his back. Ken's fingers tightened on the curtain. The lace feeling somehow rough. The embossed patterns and intricate details a focus point for his mind, keeping him in touch with reality. He musn't lose himself....

"Too late," he whispered aloud. 

Lips still saturated with alcohol clamped over his. The lace slid through his fingers. 

Outside, two boys began to build a snowman. 

********

To be continued....  
Ok...that took far too long I'm well aware and it's shorter than the other chapters but...at least it's something right? ^^; 

Thanks to all those who sent comments on the last chapter. Reishin, Lily-chan ^^, Sammy-chan, Ari, Lemon Princess, Switch, Swythangel, Jan, Arcina, watashino ane!! I love ya sis!!! ;), and Sionnachdhubh.

You guys help me think and keep me going. Arigatou! ^^

Comments always welcome. 


	6. Broken Dream

Chapter 6: Broken Dream

By: Lola

Ken's back arched off the bed, long fingers sliding down the inward curve of his spine. Butterflies. That's what it felt like. Tiny gossamer wings fluttering all over his body. Over his heart, down his back, whispering across his neck to nuzzle his ear. 

Bliss.

His eyes were shut, hardly needing to see. Hands guided, knees nudged. And lips...warm lips never strayed from Ken's for an instant. 

So fast the rhythm. Rapid breaths, a glimpse of bright orange hair, damp with sweat, clinging to a sculpted chest. The scent of vanilla mingling with musk and German beer, intoxicating. 

But so fast....

Too late.

I am fool.

Where lips hesitated, more experienced ones took control. 

Fingers closing over the cold metal of a finely linked chain. Tugging. The clasp is broken. Silver streams lost in soft pillows and red hair.

How did this happen?

Electric. Like lighting running through your body, a final arch. Is this ecstasy...?

Titian hair slides off a bare chest, still heaving. Long fingers caress the now sleeping face, memorizing the feel of every facial curve. The look of dampened earthy locks scattered across a furrowed brow. Reliving the pleasures of that small mouth, the perfect flower petal lips. Different, beautiful....

Innocent.

********

An arm reached for his lover's touch, closing only on a rumpled pillow. Brown eyes opened hesitantly. Searching. An empty bed. No warm body beside his. Had it been a dream? The stiffness in his limbs told him otherwise. Trying to suppress a rising sense of panic, Ken ran his tongue over his dry lips, the taste of imported beer still lingering on his lips.

Chewing on his bottom lip, his flushed face sunk into the pillows. The scent of vanilla impregnated there, taunting. Yet the bed was still cold. How long?

Ken rose slowly, limbs aching. Feet slid into woollen slippers as he half-heartedly slung clothes over his body. Cursing the rigid cut of his jeans as he padded towards the German's room. 

The bed, undisturbed. Sheets still spread tightly over the large mattress. Nothing on the night table. No keys for the car, no wallet strewn carelessly, no flashy gold Zippo. Nostrils flaring as he drew in rapid breaths, Ken's fingers closed over the handle for the closet. This...this was where he had seen Schuldig put his suitcase when they had arrived. Wood scraped jarringly against wood. Empty. Barren hangers. Stepping back in disbelief, Ken spun towards the dresser, yanking every drawer open. Urgency guiding his fumbling fingers and numb limbs. Holding back the tears stinging his eyes as each turned up empty. 

Not a trace. Where? Where could he have gone?

Ken sagged onto the floor, palms pressed against his face. Sobs wracking his spine, jostling his shoulders. His anguished cries drawing the attention of his companions. 

Yoji knelt beside his friend; an arm slung over his shoulders, letting the boy curl up and cry against his chest. Crawford examined the room from his perch in the doorway, noting the disarray Ken had caused with a raised eyebrow. Yoji's hand patted the brunette's back. Looking up as another shadow joined Crawford's. Ran.

Ken tentatively glanced towards the door. Those eyes. Anything but that. Ran, Ran couldn't see him like this. So weak. Once again made the fool. Yet he could not look away. Ran's fingers, long and pale, reaching down. Lifting him from Yoji's arms. One arm hooking under Ken's knees, holding him like a child. 

Soft, the wool of Ran's sweater.

Yoji watched as Ran carried Ken out of the German's room. 

"Shit...".

Lighting a cigarette, he peered up a Crawford. "This was the vision you had? Wasn't it? You knew. You knew the bastard would hurt Ken like this didn't you?"

Crawford pushed himself off the frame of the doorway, "I knew".

Eyes widened as the tall blond stood in one swift motion, "And you let it happen?! Why?"

Crawford narrowed his eyes in warning. His lips thinning grimly. "This is the way things have to be."

The cigarette drooped from Yoji's slack lips, "Shit".

"Tell Omi and Nagi to pack their things, it's time to leave".

Yoji let his eyes roam the white ceiling. A sigh. So much for a nice vacation.

********

Ken watched from his perch on the bed as Ran methodically packed his clothes. Every shirt folded three times. How could he stand there? Be in the same room as him? Didn't he realize what happened? He and Schuldig.... 

Ran was talking. His voice quiet. Informing Ken of mundane things in an overused monotone. Asking which drawer his toiletries were in. All this without a flinch, without a reprimanding frown. 

"Ran...".  
"I can't find your hat Ken so-".  
"Ran...".

"How do you live in such disorder? Ah, here it is."

Ken's eyes closed as his fists clenched the blankets at his side, "RAN STOP!"

That dark gaze finally met his own. Pain, so much pain. "I'm an idiot...a real idiot".

"Iiya."

A scarf, white, wrapped carefully around Ken's neck. Strong hands helping Ken to stand, giving strength where there was none. Ken leaned into that embrace. Cheek pressed against the flat of Ran's sweater clad chest. 

"It was just a dream wasn't it?" A desperate plea shaking Ken's voice. 

He could feel Ran's chest rise and fall in a long sigh. Focusing on that steady breathing. An anchor. Something, anything. Unwavering. Ken needed this. This rhythm. A tangible reality he could understand. 

********

Crawford sorted through the pile of mail on his desk. Junk, junk and more junk. Thrilling. With a bored sigh he leaned back in his leather chair, pinching the bridge of his nose between thumb and forefinger. 

"Isn't it great to be home?" Yoji asked with a lopsided grin as he sauntered into Crawford's office. 

The lanky blonde pressed his palms down on the desk of polished mahogany, leaning forward to kiss his lover in greeting. Crawford cupped the back of Yoji's neck in his hand, drawing him closer. Fingers twining through sandy waves as he inhaled the scent of coffee and tobacco. 

A soft knock on the office door. A grumbled moan from Yoji as Crawford broke the kiss and sat up in his chair and bid Ran to enter.

Crawford watched the thin redhead move through the doorway, closing it gently behind himself before he levelled his gaze Crawford's way.

"Well? How is he?"

A sigh escaped Ran's lips, "Asleep."

Yoji slid off the desk to stand by the window, staring out at the bright wintry landscape of Tokyo. He frowned. Where had Schuldig gone? And how could he have left Ken is such a state?

"Tch", he muttered as a cigarette found its way to his lips. 

Ran's fists tightened, betraying his frustration. Crawford studied those balled fists, the white of those knuckles. Such anger. 

Crawford pursed his lips, choosing his words carefully, "When Ken wakes up...". Ran looked up, waiting. "Take him out".

"Out?"

"Out."

"Aa".

Ran opened the door then paused as he looked over his shoulder, "Where?"

Black brows furrowed in response, an indication that Crawford wasn't the one with the answers this time.

"Harajuku".

Ran glanced at Yoji's slender back as he stood, one hand resting on his hip, smoke curling from his mouth to caress the window's glass surface. 

"There's a Kiddy Land store that Ken likes there."

Ran let a brief smile flicker across his face, "Aa, doumo".

********

Ken awoke slowly. Rubbing his eyes in annoyance at the light filtered through the curtains across the room. The angle of the sunlight streaking right across his eyes. He had no desire to be awake. He started to sit up then froze. Sitting beside his bed, head nestled in folded arms, the face of an angel. Hair the texture of silk, spilled crimson onto the white sheets. 

Ken stared. Had Ran been with him all this time? Watching over him? Ken's eyes misted as he reached out to brush those soft strands from the beautiful face of his sleeping friend. 

Eyes opened, gazing up softly. Lips forming a tiny smile of amusement as Ken flushed and withdrew his hand.

"Ohayou".

Unable to resist Ken's flustered look, Ran ruffled his hair. Fingers lingering on Ken's cheek, tracing the perfect curve down to his jaw. 

"Kawaii".

Ran felt the heat rise in Ken's cheeks beneath his fingertips. 

Ken shifted uncomfortably under the intensity of Ran's stare, feeling giddy yet ashamed. He didn't deserve such kindness. 

"Mou...Ran I-I don't deserve-"

Ran raised a hand to silence him. "Daijoubu, Ken".

Ken fisted the sheets in his hands, "...gomen ne...".

Nudging Ken's chin lightly, Ran leaned forward and pressed his lips against a baffled Ken's briefly. A light kiss. One of pure affection. Not lust. Genuine love. 

Allowing a quiet laugh to echo in the room, Ran held Ken's face in his hands. "The only person I'm mad at here Ken is Schuldig, for hurting you. Wakatta?"

Ken nodded dumbly.

"Good".

Ran stood, smoothing out the folds in his sweater. "You should get up now though, I'm taking you on a date."

Ken's eyes bulged as his cheeks flushed even more, "A date?"

"Hai. I'll be back to check up on you in an hour, you better be ready". With that Ran winked and left.

Ken stared at where Ran had been standing, did he wink? Ran? Ken rubbed his temples. Had the entire world gone crazy in the past 48 hours? 

Downstairs he could hear Omi's laughter from the Koneko, probably trying to fend off the latest tide of fan girls. Everything sounded normal. Happy even. His fingers strayed to his lips, recalling the soft touch of Ran's mouth. So gentle. 

Schuldig was right. He did still love Ran. How could he not? Despite everything Ran had done in the past, he was the one here, still protecting him. And Schuldig was....

Another sigh. Stretching, Ken began sorting through his clothes, wondering what he should wear for his date. 

********

A light wet snow flitted about the air, melting in hair and clinging to lashes. Children tilted their heads to the silver sky, wanting desperately to catch a flake or two with their tongues. Squeals of delight echoing in the streets marking their victory. Ran allowed a small smile to grace his face, was that content in his eyes or simply the reflection of the falling snow?

He watched as a young girl caught a snowflake on the tip of a woollen mitten and brought it close to her face to examine it, only to pout in sadness when her breath turned the glittering dust to water. 

"It reminds me of Aya-chan;" his voice filled with a fondness that only thoughts of his sister could bring forth. 

Ken nodded. Trying to smile. It was good to see Ran like this. At ease, at peace. His smile making him appear even more serene, more beautiful. More out of reach....

They stopped in front of a bakery, eyeing the freshly baked breads taunting them from behind the glass. Ken stared at Ran as he reached a gloved hand to tuck an ear tail behind his ear and leaned closer to the window, captured by the hypnotic glint of gold dangling at his ear. 

Feeling dizzy, he pressed his palms against the glass, his breath fogging the window. 

"Daijoubu ka?" 

Ran's hand at this waist, supportive.

"H-hai...shinpai shinaide kudasai". [1]

Ran moved back, staring up at the falling snow. "You need to eat Ken, wait here."

That said, Ran turned, trench coat billowing below his waist as he entered the bakery. 

Ken waited; leaning back against the glass, the scent of pastries and bread greeting him in tantalizing gusts every time the shop door opened accompanied by the jingle of bells. Three foreign girls emerged, each laughing and clutching a buttery baguette in brown paper bags and wrapped in wax paper. They passed him without a second glance, the only words on their lips being 'bishounen' and 'subarashii' [2]. A smile crossed his lips briefly as one girl, a redhead, bumped into him, blushing profusely. 

"Gomen nasai!" she bowed quickly before running away with her two friends, their laughter echoing as they fled to the train station. 

As his eyes trailed after them, he caught sight of a crowd forming around a particular shop. Intrigued, he pushed himself off the window, glancing inside once to make sure Ran was still there before joining the crowd. 

Cute stuffed toys were on display. Their soft bodies appealing to child and adult alike as they all paused to sigh and exclaim how cute they were. Ken reached down, plucking a large baby seal plushie from the stand. Staring into the round eyes of ebony imbedded in white softness. He felt a slight tug at the edge of his jacket. A small child no more than three or four clutched at the end of his jacket, wide eyes staring up at him from under a thick mass of bright orange bangs. 

Ken's gaze softened as he knelt by the foreign girl, handing her the stuffed seal. She squealed in delight, hugging it to her chest for dear life.

"Danke!" [3]

Ken started. 'Danke'? German? Hai, the child was German. He stared as she ran towards two figures, one a beautiful woman, hair straight and black as it framed her round face, cut perfectly to align with the curve of her jaw. She nodded in Ken's direction, a small acknowledgement of his presence before turning on her heel, grey skirt spun of the finest wool flowing around her legs as she knelt by her daughter. The red of her lipstick leaving a smudged mark on her daughter's white cheek. 

The girl was hoisted in the air by the other figure, no doubt her father. The tall man held her high as she squealed in delight. As the man spun her around, Ken felt his stomach tighten. There could be no mistake.

Streaming hair like fire over a dark leather coat, thin brows, that wide smile, and the voice. How could Ken forget that nasal voice? That voice which plagued his mind, haunting him. Last heard speaking words of seduction, meant only for Ken, now laughing as it echoed in another tongue.

Schuldig.

Ken felt sick. Backing up, he nearly tripped over the surrounding crowd. A flash of silver. 

"Iie...".

A ring on the woman's left hand glinted as she ran a hand through her short hair. Ken stared back at Schuldig as he buried his nose in the young girl's hair, so akin to his own. The woman laughed, arms crossing over her tailored jacket, nails painted lavender, a perfect compliment to her grey skirt and amethyst earrings. Ken's stomach churned. Plastered on Schuldig's cheek, the same red mark of expensive cosmetic tainting his skin as displayed on the woman's lips. Schuldig froze, lowering the girl back to the pavement, as he stood straight. The sudden wave of emotion emanating from an all too familiar source demanding his attention. Slowly, he turned, eyes locking with Ken's. He reached out a mental caress only to wince at the intense pain burning within Ken's jumbled brain. 

He took a step forward.

"Ken...".

Shaking his head in denial, Ken pushed through the crowd, not caring who he shoved past. Not noticing when he barrelled through Ran. Deaf to the cries of both Ran and Schuldig as they helplessly tried to call him out of the throbbing masses. 

He ran, hot tears melting the snow as it fell on his cheeks. He wasn't going back. He had to escape. This wasn't the reality he wanted. The hurt was supposed to end. Turning down an alley he pressed his palms against the cold brick. Body bent, sobs rocking his shoulders. Stomach heaving from running without taking the time to breathe and the overflow of painful emotions.

His breakfast splattered onto the pavement in wet sob filled coughs. Drained and tired, Ken crawled behind a juice machine. His body curling into the tightest ball possible, attempting to render himself invisible. He had lost....

********

"Ken!" Schuldig started to pursue only to be held back by the woman at his side.

Cold eyes held him in place, a slight lowering of one thin eyebrow rooting the German firmly to the pavement. 

Ran stared at the trio of foreigners. From the young girl clutching Schuldig's leg to the serious woman at his side, fingers holding the telepath by the elbow. His eyes narrowed, had this been a few years ago, the cry of 'Takatori shine' would have been associated with the look he shot Schuldig. His fingers subconsciously straying to his side to feel for the absent hilt of his katana. 

Noticing that the crowd's attention was now diverted from the stuffed toys to himself, Ran deliberately turned his back to the German, swallowing his ire, the need to strike out, there would be time for that later but for now....

_'**I'm** going to find him this time, let it go.'_

He left that thought with the German along with a very graphic image of what he'd do to him if he chose to interfere. One did not invoke Ran Fujimiya's wrath without repercussions. Tucking the package of hot bread under one arm, Ran started in the direction Ken had fled. Pausing only when Schuldig's mind responded quietly in a tone the former leader of Weiss had never thought he'd hear.

Fear.

Ran glanced over his shoulder and nodded slightly. Putting the crowd behind him he broke into a run, trench coat whipping about his legs, buckled boots crunching snow to slush. Relying on instinct to guide him through the youth endowed streets of Harajuku. Schuldig's last thought driving him onward relentlessly.

_'...hayaku'. _[4]

********

To be continued....

[1] _Shinpai shinaide kudasai_: Please don't worry.

[2] _Subarashii_: Wonderful.

[3] _Danke_: Thank you.

[4] _Hayaku_: Hurry. 

A.N.: Another chapter done! Weee! Heh, bet none of you were expecting that huh? Wahhahahaaha! Don't worry; before I get tons of hate mail...let me explain, I am incapable of writing a sad ending so let that be a consolation for the moment. All will be right in the end even though things seem pretty bad for little Kenken right now. ^^; Once again I apologize for my tardiness in posting additional chapters but...university consumed much of my time. So the next chapter will probably come after finals are done. Gomen ne minna!

Ahem...anyway I must thanks those who commented on the last chapter, Lily-chan as always ^^, Yotan (Your insights into the characters help me enormously), Yamato Luv7, Shuzuka, Shonenlyn, Royston, Lemon Princess, Priscilla, Koneko IX, Steel Song, Diana, LN Tora, Truth and ....I know I'm forgetting people... Gomen ne! If I didn't mention you, I'm sorry I'll be sure to emphasize my thanks to you next time. ^^ Arigatou gozaimasu!!! 


	7. Distance

Chapter 7: Distance.

by Lola

It was getting colder. Ran's frustrated breaths clouded the night air around his mouth. How could Ken manage to hide for so long? He had ran around the entire district of Harajuku, entered every toy store, every sports shop, even a few bars just in case Ken felt the need to drown his sorrows. Nothing. 

Mentally reminding himself that a person does not simply disappear, Ran continued through the crowded streets. He glanced down at the package under his arm, the bread now cold and squished and opened it with a sigh. Ken's favourite, melon bread. White sweetened pastry crumbs flaked from the bun. Ran wrapped it back up in the bag and made his way to a phone booth. Like it or not, he was running out of ideas. 

Propping the red receiver on one shoulder, Ran shoved a coin into the thin slot. Gloved fingers pushing the number keys in rapid succession. Tugging on his earring impatiently as the ringing echoed in his ear. The sound of the coin being accepted accompanied the composed voice on the other line.

_"Yes Ran?"_

With a steadying breath, Ran related the scenario of earlier this afternoon for Crawford. Attempting without success to conceal the frustration in his voice and the rising panic. Then waited. Surely Crawford would know where Ken was.

As he listened to Crawford's instructions, eyes staring blankly at the passing crowds, there he was.

Ken.

Slumped shoulders, head bowed. Feet dragging through slush, hands shoved into the pockets of his jacket. The phone slid through Ran's fingers, Crawford's voice trailing away as he left the receiver dangling. 

********

Crawford cursed as he hung up his cell phone and slammed it on his desk. Damn Ran and his sporadic behaviour! Running a hand roughly through his hair, he stood, pacing before the window. Narrowed eyes scanned the cityscape indecisively for a moment. Fingers reaching to loosen the tie around his neck. Another pair of hands guiding his movements as his own fingers fumbled with the knot. 

"Tense?" A sultry voice inquired, fingers sliding down Crawford's chest to settle around his waist.

"Irritated."

"Mmm".

Crawford caught the questing fingers before they could delve under the folds in his shirt and turned towards Yoji.

"Not-" his eyes clouded for a moment, a distant look in his eyes before he roughly seized Yoji's wrist and dragged him towards the door. Grabbing Yoji's car keys as he passed and tossing them at the blond.

"Where are we going?" Yoji asked, confusion lacing his low voice. 

Crawford locked the door behind them with a quick turn of his wrist, "On a rescue mission".

********

Bills were flipped and counted with practiced ease. The tallied amount being scribbled on a notepad on the counter. Tapping his mouth with the end of the pencil thoughtfully, Omi turned to his dark haired companion.

"We did surprisingly well today. Especially considering none of the others were in the shop".

Nagi shrugged his shoulders, "It's the holiday season, everyone's in the mood to give I guess."

Omi grinned as he shut the cash register with his hip, moving to take off his apron. "Thanks for helping me out today".

Nagi nodded and went to the door, waiting for Omi to shut the lights and close up. Outside, the blond looked up into the dark sky, eyes shining with delight at the gentle snow that drifted down.

"Kirei..." [1].

Nagi laughed, "I can't believe it, we just spent a week in the mountains surrounded by snow and you're still acting like you've never seen it before!"

A pout accentuated by frosted lashes. "Mou...Nagi-kun, I just like the way the white blankets everything. Reminds me of new beginnings."

An amused grin in response along with a raised brow, "Aren't new beginnings in spring?"

Omi rolled his eyes, shoving the other boy lightly. Nagi staggered a bit, arms waving wildly as he tried to keep his balance. Omi reached out to snatch the collar of Nagi's jacket in an attempt to hold him up. For a second, it seemed like Nagi was safe from falling, until the heel of his boot slid on a patch of ice sending him downward, Omi flying with him. They were soon a pile of thin limbs and nervous chuckles. 

Nagi was staring up at the roundest blue eyes he'd ever seen as Omi leaned over him, demanding if he was alright. 

Snow fell in a glittering dusting on blond hair. Cold air turning round cheeks pink, as the surrounding whiteness made soft lips appear flushed with colour. Nagi practically willed time to stop as he reached up, experimentally caressing the other youth's face. Fingers curling around that slender neck, easing it downward so as to bring that beautiful face closer. Just a bit more.... Both their eyes closed in anticipation, hearts beating wildly as they sensed the other's closeness. 

_Brrrrrrrrringgggg!_

They jumped as a soft ringing pulsed from Nagi's inner breast pocket. Palms still flat on the other boy's chest; Omi blushed and pushed himself up as Nagi fished for his cell phone. 

"Moshi mo-" 

Omi waited as Nagi spoke to someone, Crawford he imagined from the concentrated frown creasing the telekinetic's brow. 

"Hai. Hai. Wakarimashita". [2]

A beep as the phone was shut off and replaced in his jacket with a quiet sigh. "Do you have the keys to Ken's apartment?"

********

He wasn't aware how he had gotten into a car. His cheek pressed against Ran's slender thigh, body curled up in the back seat. Eyes open yet unseeing. His body kept trying to tighten the ball it was in, an unconscious attempt for warmth. A gloved hand rubbed his shoulder in concern before resting on his hip.

Green eyes kept a careful watch in the rear view mirror, desperate to know that his friend was alright. Slender fingers pushed back wavy bangs as the other hand slid across the smooth leather padding of the steering wheel. He needed a cigarette.

Crawford shut his cell phone, sliding into his jacket absently.

"I alerted Nagi to Ken's condition, he and Omi should be getting things ready."

Yoji nodded, eyes on the road, for once speeding not out of desire for the rush but out of concern for his friend. The drive home seeming like an eternity before he pulled into the quieter streets surrounding the Koneko no Sumu Ie.  
"Yoji get the door, I'll help Ran with Ken."

Yoji practically flung himself out of the car, rushing to the door to hold it open as Crawford and Ran slowly carried Ken through it.

"I've got him."

A calm voice. The three men looked up to see Nagi at the top of the stairs one hand raised as he lifted Ken's body with his mind. 

Ken didn't protest, his voice incapable of sounding out anything aside from the occasional sigh. A wave of light and warmth as he drifted into the bathroom, the other men close on his heels.

"Why don't you take a bath Ken-kun?"

Brown eyes blearily faced Omi. Brows furrowed anxiously, hands clasped in a tight ball.

Ken simply stared at the steaming waters of the bath, unable to even smile at the abundant foam that floated on the surface. Ordinarily he would think so many bubbles to be a wonderful sight and would have hopped in fully clothed in his excitement. Now it seemed all he could do was stare, as if it were no longer in his power to have any other reaction.

Hands seized his face, raising his chin until he stared into beautiful purple eyes.

"Ken?"

Ran's eyes sought permission even as his hands slid off Ken's jacket and began working on the buttons of his shirt. A barely perceptible nod. The others left Ken to Ran's care.

Ken's body wavered, unbalanced as Nagi ceased his hold on him, the sudden grip of gravity nearly sending him to the floor but for Ran's quick reflexes.

"I'll be right outside if you need anything Kenken..." Yoji's voiced trailed as he closed the door behind him. 

Ran quickly stripped Ken of the rest of his cold damp clothes, aiding him in entering the warmth of the bath. He started to leave until he noticed that Ken simply sat in the water, unmoving. A sigh sending a few stray bubbles into the air. Kneeling beside the tub, one hand on the brunette's shoulder, Ran's eyes searched Ken's face for a sign of what he should do. Ken blinked, a single large tear rolling down the curve of his cheek. The redhead winced, instantly throwing his arms around the younger man, not caring if he got wet, simply holding him, trying to will the other's pain away.

********

Green eyes stared off into space; slouched on a couch, spine melting into the pillows and the quilt his back pressed against. One hand jingling the ice in his drink, the sweet scent of Irish cream filling his senses. A tongue ran over thin lips, savouring the chocolaty flavour. Smooth, delicate. His head tilted back against the cushions, eyes half-closed, lost in a delicious memory of bronzed skin and brown eyes. His mind playing back the delectable images so vividly that he soon felt something wet spread across his jeans.

Sitting up with a curse, Schuldig eyed his spilt drink in irritation. An amused chuckle greeted his ears as a napkin sailed towards him. Snatching the cloth he began dabbing at his pants. 

"Danke."

"Eva is ready to say goodnight."

He nodded, tossing the soiled napkin in the garbage as he made his way to the child's room. A soft blue glow reflected on her pale cheeks, her night-light bathing the entire room. He smiled. Fingers ruffling fiery hair so akin to his own. She giggled, grabbing at his hands in childish swipes. Schuldig's eyes softened at the sight of the seal plushie at her side.

"Papa?"

He looked down into those large inquiring eyes; her tiny fingers still curled around his as he sat on the edge of the small bed.

"You're sad...why?"

He ran a thumb over the girl's cheek, "Why would I be sad love, hm?"

A shrug of tiny shoulders, "Because that boy with the kind eyes was sad...?"

Schuldig's eyes closed. His daughter could be a little too perceptive at times it seemed. He let a smile cross his lips as he chuckled. "Is my little Eva reading my mind now?" he asked, tickling her belly, delighting in her squeals of laughter as she squiggled in the bed.

"Papa!! Stop!" Each word punctuated with a giggle.

Schuldig relented, tucking the blankets back around the girl, smoothing her hair as it spilled onto the pillow. Slowly he began to sing a soft lullaby, his voice lulling the girl to sleep, a contented smile on her lips as she murmured goodnight. His singing drew a shadow to the doorway; dark eyes watching the man with tenderness rarely displayed. Pressing a kiss to each of her eyelids, Schuldig rose. Pausing only to tuck one last wisp of hair behind her ear.

"Good night little one."

Leaving the door slightly ajar in case she needed him, he nodded towards the woman outside the door. Wrapping an arm around her shoulders as they walked back to the living room where coffee awaited them.

"She looks like an angel when she sleeps;" the German sighed as he folded himself onto the sofa. Hands cupping around the offered mug of hot coffee. Inhaling the strong brew topped with a swirl of cream.

"She is happy her papa is home."

Schuldig glanced at the woman at his side, the straight hair cutting across her cheek as she looked away.

"And you?"

She raised her mug to her lips, licking the residue of cream clinging on her upper lip, "I am always happy to see you when you can spare the time for your old friend." A slight smile. "Though I'm sure there is another who desires your company more at the moment...".

"Ingrid..." he began slowly, sliding his eyes over to hers.

Her eyes glinted as she fingered the silver band on her finger. "That man we saw today, you wounded him didn't you?"

"He wounds easily." The half-muttered response drowned by a gulp of coffee.

Ingrid shook her head, toying with one of her earrings. "You love him Schuldig. Admit it."

He remained silent, studying the mug held between his hands, lost in the dark shade of brown. Ingrid placed a hand on his knee; "You never explained did you?"

He shook his head slowly, rising to pace about the room pausing to lean his hip against the doorway. A finger dragged along the wood pensively. 

"He loves another." he replied evenly as if that settled the matter.

"The redhead."

A quick jerky nod accompanied by a heave of his chest as he pushed himself off from the wall. His trademark smirk flashed briefly as he poked Ingrid.

"So you see my lovely, my feelings matter not."

The smile faltered as she shot him a glare, smacking his hand away. Her eyes softened when she saw the momentary pain flicker in his eyes. Hands cupped his face, lips pressed against his tenderly. His hands slid around her slender waist. Unused to the curve of her body resting against his as she embraced him.

"You are a fool Schuldig".

She released him, gathering the mugs in her hands to take into the kitchen, watching with approval as he reached for his keys. When she returned she still found him standing in the doorway, keys clutched in his fist, brows drawn in indecision. A muffled thud as the keys landed in the carpet. His forehead leaned against the doorway to the apartment; eyes closed tightly, hair curtaining his face in a veil of fiery orange.

Fingers laced through those fine strands, smoothing them over a lean back. Arms encircled the man from behind. A cheek pressed against his back. He placed his own hands over the ones linked at his waist. Patting them reassuringly.

"I'm alright." he laughed hollowly as he broke the embrace. "I just need air..."he finished finally as she stared at him doubtfully. He winked as he threw his leather coat over his shoulders, grimacing a little as he tugged his long mane from being pinned inside. He declined the keys she offered, explaining he preferred to walk tonight.

"I will see you again right?" she asked with a laugh, though the look in her eyes spoke of a deep concern for the man.

That grin. She rolled her eyes as he gave a little bow, "Of course." A flamboyant flick of his hair over one shoulder with one hand dramatically placed on an angular hip. Sunglasses tucked in wild hair.   
"Auf Wiedersehen." [3]

The woman lifted her hand in farewell, watching the redhead strut down the carpeted hallway to the elevator, hands digging into pant pockets. Closing the door softly and padding barefoot to her daughter's room. Watching moonlight stream through pink lace to fall upon the child's round face. Memories of a Schuldig as a boy, wild orange hair, bright green eyes. A smile curved painted lips. She was a lucky woman. She owed Schuldig so much. Her fingers brushed past Eva's forehead, caressing. Placing a quick kiss on the child's balled fist, lips leaving red cosmetic on tiny knuckles.

She glanced out the window; the street below alight with street lamps and red flames as people lit cigarettes in the winter night. Her fingertips pressed against the fogged window, dark eyes watching a trail of fiery hair flutter in the snow-laden wind. He froze, his face upturning to stare at the window in the building. Lips quirking upward.

_'Danke...Ingrid...'._

********

Ken stared at his ceiling. White plaster. Fascinating. He rolled over; unable to get comfortable in the mass of blankets Yoji and Ran had buried him in. Throwing some off in frustration he rose from his bed. Feet sliding into well-worn slippers, inching towards the door. Voices outside. Ran and Yoji. Still hovering Ken realized with a sigh as he trudged back to his bed. A sudden glint of silver on his desk drawing his attention as he shuffled over.

His fingers slid through silver chain, the clasp broken. The links rippling across his palm as he tilted it in the light filtered through the window. A slender band of silver. He examined it. Rolling it between his fingers, trying to sound out the inscription written in a foreign tongue.

"Ich...liebe...dich...". [4]

His fist clenched. The one piece that Schuldig had left behind. A piece of jewellery usually concealed. Only revealed during a night of intense emotion, passion tearing the silver stream. Ken brought the chain to his lips; they vaguely retained the scent of vanilla. A sharp intake of breath before the chain slipped through spread fingers to clatter onto the desk. 

On impulse Ken threw open his window, letting the winter air rip through his pyjamas and send frost into his hair. A shiver, not from the cold...something internal.

_'Ken...'._

Brown eyes looked down at the figure beneath the window. Clouds forming around his mouth, hair heavy with snow, lashes wet and sparkling under the street light. The German stood, arms outstretched in a sign of peace. Ken's eyes shut tightly, fighting tears. His fingers closed around now cold metal.

Green eyes widened as something sailed from the window. A silver trail landing in his hand with a light tinkle. Schuldig eyed the ring, perched on the knuckle of one gloved thumb. His eyes darted back to the window as it slammed shut.

The German eyes lowered in acceptance, back turned to the building. Snatching a red frosted rose from the day's surplus outside the Koneko. White dusting its petals like droplets of dew. A fist clenched. Petals crushed in a sudden vice. 

A trail of frozen petals like a spray of blood left across the snow. Red and white.

********

To be continued....

[1] _Kirei_: _Pretty._

[2] _Wakarimashita_: _I understand._

[3] _Auf Wiedersehen_: _(German) Goodbye._

[4]_ Ich liebe dich_: _(German) I love you._

Wai wai!! Another chapter complete! *wipes forehead* Whew, nearly kills me every time this does. ^^; I know things seem pretty bleak right now, but fear not! There is always hope. ~.^ Once again my apologies for taking so damn long, trust me I find just as frustrating. ; *attacks Schu out of frustration*

Ahem....anyway! I **did** forget to mention people last time. Gomen nasai, I am a baka. -_- So, as promised I will thank you first. 

So, a big thank you to **Royston **(don't kill me ne? I did continue it ^^; ), **Himitsu**, and **Madiha**. *bows*

And now for all those who wrote or reviewed regarding the last chapter: Lily-chan (thanks for being patient with me ^______^), Siberian, Minkus (You flatter me with your kind words ^^), Shuzuka, Hana-chan, ok...someone didn't leave their name but they took the time to review so thank you Anonymous-san, Akane-H (did I get that right? ^^; ), Switch, Copper (*runs from your alligator*), Eeyore (Arigatou for the beautiful fan art ^______^), Lemon Princess, Shonenlyn, Delfin, Alek (Merci a tes amis aussi!), Truth, Michele, Sammy-chan (Arigatou for the German! Sorry if I made a mess of it ^^), Stormy, Bishie no Miko, Casey (^^ Ne, was it worth the wait?), Shavica and TK Date. Thank you all!!! *.* You guys and gals are ichiban!! Ok enough of my ranting, ok, just a bit more...THANK YOU!!!!!! Hee hee! You seriously do make my day people. I dedicate this to all my readers. Arigatou...zutto.


	8. Hope

Chapter 8: Hope

By Lola

__

Dedicated to Casey-chan for inspiring me...and Lily-chan for the patience of a saint. ^______^

Children ran over the soccer field, tiny feet fumbling over the ball. Slipping in snow and slush, laughing. A whistle blew out in the crisp morning air, the game won. 

Ken watched from a distance. The kids running up to their coach, smiles on their faces, cheeks flushed from the exhilaration of the game. A soft smile. He shuffled his feet in the snow, his shoulder leaning against the thin trunk of a Japanese maple. If he waited long enough, the field would clear. 

It was snowing again. Large flakes swirling down like cotton balls. 

Alone, he jogged over the now virgin field. Scattered boot prints in light snow. His soccer ball rolling between his feet as he ran it down the field. A well-placed kick had the ball spinning into the net. Ken let out a long breath. Had he been in the net he could have stopped it. He crouched in the snow before the net, staring at the lone ball resting against the lattice of string. His tongue darted over his dry lips, tasting the melted snow gathered on his upper lip. He rubbed his cheek with a slight smirk, feeling a thin layer of stubble craze his palm. He needed to shave.

Slow footsteps, yet the beat of the step indicating a confident walk. The scent of burned tobacco and cologne. Ken didn't have to turn around to know Yoji stood behind him.

"You done here Kenken?"

The brunette tilted his head up and to the side, catching low hanging shades and a haze of smoke with his eyes.

Yoji shifted, sliding his sunglasses up into his hair at Ken's prolonged silence. One eyebrow thinly arched, a slender finger scratching a sculpted chin. 

"I promised Ran I'd watch over you while he spends the day with Aya-chan...".

Ken squinted up at the tall blonde, a streak of sunlight breaking through the clouds and shining over his shoulder. He bit his lip thoughtfully for a moment.

"Yoji...? What would you do if you found out Crawford had betrayed you?"  
Yoji inhaled slowly, the cold air frigid in his lungs. Ken's eyes watched for any flicker of emotion, any sign that would indicate what he should do. Crawford had warned him this would happen. A long drag on his cigarette followed by a vague gesture in the air.   
"Ken...everybody's situation is different. What's right for me, might not be right for you."

"I know." A frown. 

Ken's fingers traced tiny circles in the snow. "Do you think...do you believe Ran loves me?"

Yoji knelt beside his friend, watching the concentric circles form from Ken's finger. "Do you?"

Ken sighed. This was difficult. When with Schuldig, he couldn't forget his love for Ran. And now that Schuldig was gone...he couldn't seem to get the German out of his head. Green eyes and orange hair haunted his dreams. And it had been over two weeks since he had last seen the telepath outside his window.

He knew Ran cared for him. He couldn't doubt that. But there was something...he couldn't quite place it. It was all so foreign, so confusing.

"He said he did." He finally let out.

Yoji nodded, puffing thoughtfully on his cigarette. He eyed Ken. Noting the furrowed brows, the downward slope of his mouth. The tight line of his jaw. "Do you love Ran?"

Brown eyes closed, a long pause as he exhaled slowly. "He's beautiful."

Yoji almost laughed. "That he is. But do you love him?"

Silence.

They knelt there, under the drifting snow. Random streams of sunlight flickering across their hair. A trail of smoke from Yoji's cigarette floating lazily in the wind. Ken rubbed his hands together, cupping them over his mouth. Slowly, Ken shook his head. Standing shakily, he kicked the snow in frustration.

"Damn it! I still..." he trailed off, hands running through his hair in irritation.

Yoji rose, stretching out his long limbs. Placing a hand on his friend's shoulder, he looked up at the sky.

"I think...you should talk to him. Sometimes, things aren't what they seem."

"Hai..."

They left it at that. Both men trekking across the soccer field, slow footsteps creating slushy prints in the snow. 

********

"Come on! Circle! Ok, faster! Faster! Hai, that's it. Summon Odin. No!"

Two figures, one kneeling in front of the television, deeply engaged in playing a video game. Knuckles white from holding the remote control in a death like grip. Thumbs jabbing at circular buttons frantically. Pink lips parted, large blue eyes intent on the flashing colours on the screen. The other, slightly thinner, standing behind the player, shouting commands in fevered excitement. 

"Mou! Nagi-kun! I can't beat him!"

The dark haired teen knelt behind Omi, chin resting on the other's shoulder, one arm snaking around his slender waist to seize one side of the controls.

"Here, you take the right side; I'll take care of the directional buttons."

A quick nod. 

Forty-five seconds of tense shoulder muscles and held breath. A unified cheer as the victory jingle sent their on screen characters dancing. Omi tossed the controls, turning to throw his arms around his friend. 

Nagi lifted a brow in surprise but received the live missile with a pleased smile. Omi's arms tightened around his shoulders, chest pressing closer to his. Nagi could feel the other boy's pulse racing beneath his white t-shirt. Nagi tilted his head to the side, nose pressing against blond hair, lips inches from his neck. Impulsively, his mouth sought that golden skin below Omi's earlobe. He pressed against him lightly at first, a simple contact, skin on skin. He felt Omi's body gasp and stiffen momentarily.

He swallowed; not relinquishing his hold on the older boy yet drew his head back slightly. Giving Omi air.

Wide-eyed, Omi's cheeks flushed a delicious shade of pink, the sight making Nagi's own face redden. Slowly, Omi's hands slid up Nagi's chest, curving over his shoulders, fisting in the loose wool of his black sweater. 

"Nagi...kun..."

His eyes lowered, staring down at their knees. Nagi busied himself brushing the thick bangs out of the beautiful boy's face, letting his hands rest on either side of his round face. Thumbs absently caressing the perfect curve of cheeks painted by a blush. 

"I think...I want to kiss you."

Nagi blinked. Had he heard right? Omi looked up, large eyes seeking permission from the dark haired youth. The telekinetic stared at the ceiling as he let out a deep breath thoughtfully.

"Omi...I think..." brow furrowed before dark lashes lowered coyly, "You have to."

Nagi closed his eyes and was rewarded by the hesitant brush of lips over his. He pressed closer, surprised as Omi responded instantly, mouth pushing against his imploringly. Omi was stronger than he let on, his body firmly forcing Nagi to acquiesce and lay back on the carpeted floor. Straddling the younger boy's hips Omi rocked against him. Nagi gasped through Omi's feathery kisses, granting his would-be lover more access. 

Young bodies writhed on the floor, the rough carpet grinding painfully across the small of Nagi's back as his sweater shifter ever upward. His hair would no doubt be erect with static when he got up but he wasn't in the position for caring. His nails dug into the carpet. An indent of crescent moons left in his wake. 

Neither heard the shop bells chime as Ken and Yoji returned. Lost in the sensation of the other's skin, the closeness both so long desired now attained. Nor did they notice the light in the room flash on, their eyes being squeezed shut, enjoying the pleasure of simply _feeling_. 

"Ha! Crawford owes me 1000 yen!"

Yoji's crow of victory coupled with Ken's astonished gasp shattered the mood for the couple lost in a make-out session on the floor amongst game wires and a knocked over bowl of popcorn. 

Nagi sat up, pieces of popped kernels floating in his hair. He eyed the two men in the doorway for a moment. One laughing hysterically, slapping his knee, the other sputtering in disbelief, looking more embarrassed than the ones being caught. Omi's head was buried in his hands and he seemed to be trying to shrink into himself, wanting very much to vanish from everyone's sight. Nagi frowned at Yoji's continued lewd remarks and Ken's fish-like mouth twitches. 

A single thought.

A wave of energy pulsed from Nagi's body firmly shoving the older men out of the room, the door slamming shut and locking with a resounding thud in their faces. Over the loud slam of the door Nagi's command was clearly heard.

"GET OUT!!"

Body heaving, Nagi turned back to Omi, eyeing the slender boy apologetically. His shoulders were hunched and trembling slightly. Nagi started in shock, reaching out to place his palm over his knee gently. Massaging lazy circles through the denim.

"Hey, don't worry about those idiots-"

Omi looked up, falling against the other boy as he burst into laughter. After a brief period of confusion, Nagi's laughter joined Omi's, the sheer ridiculousness of the situation drawing loud bouts of laughter from both. 

********

Eyes bloodshot, he scanned the street outside the apartment window. Wet snow streaking down the French glass doors to the balcony. An arm leaning against the cool glass, forehead pressed tiredly against a stiff shirtsleeve. Untamed hair falling unnoticed in his face, obscuring the view in a veil of fire. A half-drunk bottle of Asahi on the floor by his feet nestled amongst five of its barren companions. His left arm limp, fist clenching and unclenching, fingers toying with a plain silver band dangling from a broken chain. Knotting the silver links, chain tangling around his fingers. 

Why wouldn't he listen...?

He brought one hand quickly across his eyes, staring down in mild surprise at the salty moisture glistening on his palm. 

"You're making this more difficult than necessary."

A calm voice.

Schuldig didn't bother turning. "I see you let yourself in." he murmured, still staring outside through the frosted glass.

Crawford moved to stand beside the German. Both gazing out pensively at the wintry scene. The oracle's eyes noted his former lover's red eyes and the salty tracks marring his cheeks. It was odd. In the entire time he had known the telepath he had never witnessed such an emotional display. Anger, frustration, cruelty, these things he'd seen often enough, at times first hand. But tears? No...This wasn't Schuldig.

"Why?" Schuldig turned sharply, eyes still red. "Why can't it be me Bradley?"

Crawford gave him a blank stare, noting the chain and ring clenched in his fist. Finally, whether out of pity or genuine concern, Crawford reached out, taking Schuldig's fist and loosening his grip on the silver necklace. Slowly prying his fingers open and taking it away. 

"Sentiment doesn't become you." He offered coolly. 

Schuldig turned back to the window, ignoring him much in the manner of a pouting child denied candy before dinner. 

Crawford slapped the broken chain down onto the coffee table. "Settle this Schuldig."

With a turn of his heel, he was already halfway out the door. A pause. Glancing back at his long-time friend. Jade eyes stared back at him pleading for a solution, willing to grasp at any straw, any glimmer of hope.

'_He wants to see you_.'

The door shut quietly. Schuldig held his breath, disbelieving and yet...there were some things that a man just needs to know. In a sudden rush he grabbed his coat not bothering to comb his hair or button his shirt. Tearing out of his apartment in desperation. If Ken didn't care for him in the way he wanted, so be it... But he wasn't about the throw away one of the few real friendships he'd ever had. Not when then was still a chance.

Not when it was someone he needed.

Someone he loved...

********

To be continued... 

A.N.: Wah! Gomen nasai minna!! *kowtows and grovels at everyone's feet* I know this chapter took forever and it's shorter than usual and it sucks but...well...for the length, that was just a really good place to end this chapter and I feel so bad making everyone wait so I wanted to finally post something! Even if it is short. -_- My deepest apologies for taking so long. I was just...really caught up with crap in real life and lost all inspiration (partly due to the fact that the person whose opinion matters most stated that this story sucked and that it would only be saved if I killed Ken ). So...I was pretty reluctant to attempt writing. 

So thanks to Casey-chan (Fey) for reviving my passion for the written word. *hugs* And now...for all of you who've been waiting patiently and who reviewed the last chapter a HUGE THANK YOU!!! I love you all to bits! ^__________^ Please don't hurt me. 

And so a big thanks and hugs to Silenced eyes, Shuzuka, Lily-chan, Fallen Angel from Heaven, Ice Shadow, Shavica, Swythangel, Liena-chan, Royston, Krimson, Shonenlyn, Eeyore (still drooling over your fanart btw), TK Date, Bishie no Miko, Lemon Princess, Fox, Yamato Luv 7, Skyschneckchen, Casey- chan, Kalipsaki (Kali), Umi, Cassie-oid, Od_dream, Babyflare (arigatou for the review on my I-Y fic too ^__^), Inaki, and Aishlin. *wipes brow* Woo...You all deserve cake and red headed bishounen for all your patience and support but I wouldn't be here if it weren't for all you, especially those who've reviewed more than once. Thank you. Hontou. *super glomp* Now back to writing. ~.^ 


	9. One Moment

Chapter 9: One Moment.

By Lola

Disclaimer: Weib owns me.

Warnings: A lot of yummy goo. Oh...and I think Schuschu swears in this chapter...

Dedication: _To my Gran, my heart is broken with you gone but I will always write as you wished me to. Your memory lives in my heart forever_.

____________________________________________________________________________________

Tanned fingers pushed on cold glass, forcing the window open. Outside the stray wisps of falling snow had turned to a light rain as winter slowly ebbed. Red and purple painted the sky in the distance, signs of a brighter day tomorrow. Sun, warmth. Spring was coming. Ken leaned his hip lightly against the sill, not seeming to notice the goose bumps spreading across his arms from the still crisp breeze. A light spray misting his face from the sporadic rain that fell from the awning above. 

He watched with a smile as Nagi and Omi tore out of the apartment, laughing, pushing each other playfully, circling each other before joining hands and dashing to Omi's motorcycle. 

Such happiness in their eyes.

Ken's eyes darted down to the spot where he had last seen the German. Had he been right in sending him away?

Chewing on his lip thoughtfully for a moment, he decided he needed air. Perhaps go for a walk...

Before he even had the chance to rise, there was a soft knock at his door. Believing it to be Yoji, Ken hopped off the sill and pulled his door open without hesitation. 

His eyes widened, mouth hanging open just enough to display his shock at viewing the man standing outside his door. 

Wild hair the colour of flame tumbled loosely over a familiar green jacket, untamed by the customary yellow headband. Green eyes stared at Ken, bloodshot. The usually handsome face seeming pallid, rain still clinging to low hanging bangs and keeping lips moist. 

Ken swallowed.

Not Yoji...

Brown eyes travelled down the length of the dripping jacket, noting the unbuttoned shirt beneath or rather the taunting flash of wet skin as the lanky German shifted to lean his hip against the doorframe. A slender brow arched at Ken, silently asking for permission to enter. 

Ken gave a little nod, head bowed as he held the door open for Schuldig to enter. The taller man brushed by, his body sliding past Ken's slowly for one tantalizing minute forcing the younger of the two to suck in his breath quickly. Ken closed his eyes as he shut the door, leaning his back against it for support. Schuldig was here. And he had let him in. Just like that. No questions, no tantrums, no dramatics. Why?

Because...

"You wanted to see me." Schuldig finished Ken's thought easily as he peeled off his jacket and draped it over a chair. 

Ken nodded slowly, still unsure what to do. A warm body soon had him pressed up against the back of the door, hands sliding up his exposed arms to cup his face. He had almost forgotten how quickly Schuldig could move. As if to further illustrate this point, Schuldig crushed his lips against the brunette's in a bruising kiss. Ken's hands slid under the parted folds of Schuldig's shirt, palms flat against his chest, feeling the warmth of contact from skin on skin. He had wanted this for so long. To be held like this, the German's arms fast around him, tight. Holding him close in a locked embrace. 

Their mouths meshed together, fervent kisses rushing over cheeks, jaws, necks and collarbones. Ken wasn't even aware when he had managed to pull Schuldig's shirt off but as he curled an arm around his torso he realized that they were both suddenly naked from the waist up. And he didn't care. 

Schuldig's fingers dug into Ken's shoulders.

Ken blinked, eyes half-closed and lips swollen from the intensity of their kisses as Schuldig pulled away. For a second, Ken began to panic, thinking he'd done something wrong, Schuldig was going to leave again.

"Idiot." 

Ken looked up at his friend's muttering. Slender fingers worked their way almost lovingly through Ken's short hair. A warm palm cupping the back of his neck and drawing him forward into a hug that was surprisingly gentle. A contrast to the intensity of the kiss they had just shared. 

"I won't leave you like that again..."

Ken sighed against the other's chest, knowing that the words were sincere, it was as much of an apology as Schuldig could give. 

"Why did you go in the first place Schuldig?" Ken responded quietly, dreading the answer yet needing to hear it all the same.

Schuldig's breath stirred the hairs at the top of Ken's head. Soft brown filaments licking the bottom of the German's chin and teasing the skin of his neck as he tucked Ken's head under his chin, one hand pressed against the side of his head. He held him there in silence. Content to listen to their intermingled breathing. Enjoying the rapid beat of Ken's heart, their skin hot as their chests pressed together. He had missed this. This closeness. And...

He pulled back, voice hitching in the back of his throat as brown eyes, more inviting than chocolate gazed at him in silent understanding and something else. Something more important. Something he didn't deserve.

Love.

Ken's palms curled around his hips, holding his waist in place lest he leave. His hands, so warm. Schuldig bit his lip with a hiss. Jade eyes closed firmly, eyebrows furrowed in something akin to pain. He swallowed hard. Ken's eyes watching the movement of his Adam's apple in wonder, a bronzed finger reaching out to languidly stroke the now arching column of golden skin. Lips flushed and warm kissed the angular cut of Schuldig's collarbone. He threw his head back, long hair tumbling over his bare shoulders and back like a river of fire. Ken's mouth moved lower even as his hands glided up Schuldig's toned back to tangle in that thick expanse of hair. 

A sharp cry hissed through his teeth as Ken's teeth and tongue found a sensitive area of skin along his neck. He gripped the other man's shoulders in desperation feeling himself falling. His stomach knotted. He was vaguely aware of the coppery taste of blood on his lips as he opened his mouth in a silent gasp of pleasure. His canines having dug into the soft pink flesh when Ken ran his tongue along the curve of his earlobe and sucked on it playfully. This was torture. And he loved every minute of it. But he wanted more...he needed...

Lips met his in a soft kiss, just a hint of tongue running along his bottom lip, tasting the blood briefly before pushing for more. His mouth opened, Ken's kiss wasn't deep or rough, just insistent and careful. Savouring.

Schuldig let Ken lead. It was nice for once to be the one being seduced. Past lovers had never really given the German much attention, always too busy enjoying themselves. Crawford had not been an exception. Always needing, so greedy. Taking Schuldig without any thought for foreplay only to leave the bed minutes later to shower, leaving him spent yet still yearning in a tangle of silk sheets and sweat. By giving in to Schuldig he'd assumed he was sating the other man. How wrong. Yes, Schuldig had not wanted for sex during his relationship with the American but not once did he have what he really wanted. More than physical proximity, more than wild nights of passion or trinkets of gold and silver that displayed possession more than anything sentimental in his eyes; it was understanding and loyalty. These are what he sought so desperately. The jet haired oracle couldn't give it. Schuldig had been an enigma but a tantalizing one; perhaps the only reason why he'd succumbed to the German's advances. As for loyalty...

Bradley had never cheated on him, which was a consolation in some sense. But then again, he had no need to cheat, Schuldig gave him everything, was always there to meet every desire. It hadn't been enough; Crawford was forever distracted, always thinking of golden hair and slender hips, if not that, business. The latest mission. It drove Schuldig insane. It's hard to be with a lover, with anyone when you know their every thought. When you know they're not thinking of you as you are of them. How can you feel complete knowing you aren't everything to them? He wanted to fill someone's thoughts so completely that when together, he would be all he'd see in their minds, just as they would be in his. He wanted to be seen. To have his life affirmed through another's eyes.

Then he met Ken.

Beautiful, innocent Ken.

Their friendship had been an easy one. They were held together by a common thread, both were unlucky in their choice of lovers. Yet even though Ken's heart had ached for Ran when they first met, whenever they were together, his thoughts would always shift to Schuldig, alerting him that he was giving his full attention in every way. Except for when they had gone to the cabin...and he was starting to have doubts. It had hurt. Like hell. Jealously had reared its head and Schuldig had decided right then and there that he wanted Ken to himself. Not just as a friend. But as a lover. 

A life mate.

Eyes dilated and fogged with desire, Schuldig stared at Ken. Drowning in the delectable sight of lowered lashes, full lips and skin flushed with heat. He let the pad of a thumb caress Ken's lower lip now tinted crimson from his blood. Like lipstick. It reminded Schuldig of the lips of the porcelain dolls his daughter coveted. Painted smiles. Ken's lips curved beneath his fingers. Schuldig moved his hands, sliding them to cup his lover's face, amazed at the softness of his cheeks, at the warmth of his blush against his palms. So alive. His own lips parted in a grin, not the taunting smirk he usually flashed everyone, a genuine smile that reached his eyes, corners lifting. He watched, eyes softening as the brunette turned his head to one side, kissing the inside of his hand.

Schuldig inhaled deeply.

A stray gust from the open window sent shivers down the redhead's body, spreading from his heated flesh to Ken's fingertips. He bent forward. His hair tickled Ken's chest as he rested his forehead on the other's shoulder, wanting to be closer. Needing to be touched.

As if sensing Schuldig's need, Ken slid his hand into his, fingers twining, palm to palm. His other hand cupped the back of his neck, fingers massaging skin and weaving through long hair. Schuldig sighed, his lips drifting languorously across a bronzed shoulder. He let his mouth drift over perfect skin, taunt and stretched over firm muscles before standing straight. Ken's hand still wound through his hair, pushing the long strands of flame away from his face, fingers lingering lovingly along his jaw. 

He kissed him. Slowly.

Their first time had been a rush of raw passion and unbridled desire. This time, Schuldig wanted to enjoy every sensation and take his time; he wanted to feel Ken's hands on him, his lips...everything.

Ken rose on his toes slightly in an attempt to facilitate their kiss, wanting to deepen it. Complying with his lover's wishes, Schuldig wrapped an arm around Ken's back and lifted the brunette against him. His other hand still linked with Ken's, squeezing in assurance. Using their joined hands to his advantage, the German led Ken toward the bedroom, lips still locked on the other's mouth as they moved seemingly in a trance through the apartment.

Then he was falling, fiery hair spreading in a rippling fan across white blankets. Ken was on top of him, his kisses becoming more desperate, hands holding onto Schuldig's shoulders, pressing him into the bed. The redhead shifted, lifting his hips slightly to guide Ken into a more comfortable position.

Suddenly everything went cold. The only sound, rapid breathing and the occasional creak of a floorboard. Schuldig stared up in surprise into wide brown eyes tainted with shock. He began rubbing Ken's forearms encouragingly, hoping the affectionate gesture would show that he wouldn't force Ken into anything, but his darkened eyes also indicating that he was more than willing if Ken so desired. 

Slender fingers glided down Ken's arm, settling on the former soccer player's hand, tracing slow circles. Ken turned his hand in response, clasping his friend's hand tightly, the slight tremor in his body betraying his uncertainty. 

_'What's wrong kitten?'_

The nasal voice purring in his mind jolted the man back to reality. He blinked. His eyes trailed over the slender man's body, meeting eyes of the brightest green and he smiled almost shyly. Looking away as the blush spread across his cheeks, he laughed nervously.

"Sorry."

Another reassuring squeeze of the hand. Warm palms pressed together. Long fingers stroked Ken's forehead, moving heavy bangs out of his eyes.

"Utsukushii..."[1] Schuldig breathed out slowly, openly admiring the man straddling his hips. 

Ken's blush only grew at this, spreading like wildfire across his cheekbones. 

_'Ken?' _A gentle mental prompt.

"I..." he shifted uneasily, eyes darting from jade eyes and a perfect lean body to the vase housing a dozen or so daisies on his night table. Omi always made a point of putting fresh flowers in everyone's room. His eyes focused on the fragile white petals to the butter yellow centre. _'I don't know what to do!' _his mind blurted.

Schuldig closed his eyes and bit back the bout of laughter that nearly threatened to spill forth. He settled instead for bringing their joined hands to his lips to brush a kiss over scarred knuckles. Ken's thoughts were cute and also very predictable. After all the last time, Schuldig had fully been in control but now, with Ken in the position of dominance and being allowed to lead, the poor brunette was at a loss. 

Green eyes twinkled in the grey light from the rain. _'Just let yourself feel mein liebe.'_ His thought caressed Ken, his words a comfort. 

Eyes closing momentarily as he let the tenseness in his shoulders melt away, Ken bent over the lanky body beneath him, trailing kisses along golden skin. Slender fingers clenched at brown tussled hair, needing something to latch onto. A long leg curled around one of Ken's, locking together at the ankle.

Schuldig stretched and arched as Ken nipped the hollow of his throat, fisting his hands in short hair. He rose off the bed allowing Ken to remove the studded belt around his waist. A metallic clatter as it tumbled to the floor. Warm hands pushing back his pants to reveal a slender hip. 

On sudden inspiration, Ken grabbed a handful of daisies, crushing the velvety petals in his fist only to let them flutter down around the redhead. The soft white of the blossoms a contrast to the fire of his red hair. Schuldig would have laughed at this gesture if anyone else had done it but coming from Ken it touched a part of his heart that he thought would forever remain dormant. His pulse raced, belly aflutter. 

Gods how he wanted him. So much so it hurt.

He pulled Ken down, wanting, needing his body full against him. They kissed. A kiss of hunger and mutual desire. Schuldig swallowed, hands sliding down Ken's toned torso to settle around his waist. Long arms wrapped around the younger man, tightening their grip in urgency.

A soft kiss on Schuldig's forehead.

Orange strands clinging to moist lips.

"Bitte..." [2] the word dragged raggedly from a throat parched with longing. 

Rain continued to patter against the windows creating wavering shadows across the floor, dancing over the white petals that fluttered down.

A warm rain. A herald of spring...

Of new beginnings.

* * * * * 

The rain had thickened throughout the day; cold air currents freezing the slanting curtain of water as it met the cold grey of the streets. Inside a warm apartment, bathed in the silver glow streaking in through the window, two figures wrapped in thick blankets. The taller of the two pressed up against the other from behind, spooning him in an affectionate manner, a slender yet chiselled arm draped possessively over a trim waist.

Ken felt warm. And...safe somehow. His hand absently stroked the forearm at his waist, fingers lingering to toy with the ring adorning Schuldig's right index finger. Soft lips nuzzled against the back of his neck, punctuated by the occasional nip. He could feel his lover's steady heartbeat thumping against his back. A sigh. Lying in bed, letting himself be held close, sharing in a deeper intimacy than just plain sex. He couldn't deny it. He loved this man. He loved Schuldig.

The hand tightened at his waist. Hair the colour of flame poured over his shoulder as Schuldig bent over to plant a chaste kiss on his cheek.

"I'm glad to hear it..." he murmured, pulling the other man a little closer.

Ken started at the redhead's words, distracted from his reverie. "What?"

Schuldig laughed, now tracing Ken's lips with his fingers, delighting in the soft curve of his small mouth, "That you love me."

An embarrassed flush. "Oh."

Schuldig used the hand at Ken's waist to roll the man over so that he could look at him face to face. A sly smile spread across his lips as he arched one slender perfectly curved brow, "Not that your love for me was ever in doubt after this afternoon's stirring performance."

A darker blush accompanied by a sputter as Ken bolted upright. "Schuldig!"

Laughter, nasal yet genuinely amused, not the derisive laughter reserved for enemies. "Relax kitten, you wanna scare the neighbours?" He said with a wink.

Ken muttered but relaxed back into the blankets, body curled and facing his lover. "You know..." he began quietly, "You never answered my question...".

Those tanned fingers slid over his chest, tracing a path to his belly button.

"You had two questions."

At Ken's shocked expression Schuldig lifted his hand to gently tap his right temple. 

_'You were asking in here if I loved you.'_

Ken's lips parted in silent amazement. Unable to meet intense green eyes, he turned slightly and swallowed. "You don't need to answer that one. I just...want to know why you left."

Schuldig let his hand drop to rest, palm flat against Ken's chest, unable to break contact. He needed to choose his words carefully. There were so many things at stake. Too much. Why _had_ he left? Simple, he was scared. Terrified that when Ken woke he'd be disgusted and regret. He couldn't deal with that. He didn't want to be the one who took the happy sparkle out of the most beautiful brown eyes he'd ever seen. He couldn't be the man who used Ken. Who took advantage of him. And yet by running he'd done everything wrong. He'd caused pain to one who he thought above that, and undeserving. How many nights had they spent together, sharing tea and popcorn while Ken poured his heart out about Ran, about the hurt? Schuldig had been pissed. He'd even considered having the katana wielding leader of Weiss disposed of at one time just to please Ken. But no...that wouldn't do. So he offered himself instead...

He had never bargained that along the way, he'd fall for the man. 

Hard.

He ran a hand roughly through his hair, painfully aware of Ken's eyes watching his every movement, waiting for a facial twitch to reveal something of his thoughts. "I had to Ken. For many reasons."

A long silence.

"Is it because you were drunk?"

"NO!" The answer was quick and adamant and said with the conviction Ken needed to hear.

"Then what?" He reached out, touching the strong line of Schuldig's jaw. "I'm...I won't get mad. And I promise...I won't leave."

Schuldig propped himself up on his elbows, eyes searching the ceiling. "I was watching you...sleeping." A pause. "You looked so innocent there, head buried in the pillows and I was overwhelmed with a feeling a guilt." He frowned. "Like I had done something very very wrong. Don't misunderstand me Ken, I've done nasty things in my life, cruel things, and I know that. But when we became friends, I promised myself you'd be spared that kinda shit. You'd been through enough with that fuckin' iceberg." A ghost of a smile flitted across his lips. "And I started to think of my family. Of Eva. My daughter."

Ken tensed at the reminder of his lover's other life. He had come to terms with it over the past few weeks but it still sent a pang through his chest. Didn't Schuldig trust him enough to tell him about his family? He would have understood. 

Jade eyes trapped Ken. "Would you? Have understood? Or would you have simply then decided that I was off limits and resigned to a life wishing for things that could never be?"

Damn. Schuldig was right. Ken would have backed off. Would never have entertained the thought that he had chance with the German. He raked a hand through his bed-matted hair. "Ok. I get it. I know why you kept it from me but..." brown eyes looked almost pleading. "B-but...your wife, she...you...do you love her?"

"Yes."

One word. Simple. But not the one he wanted to hear. Ken's body went rigid, knuckles whitening as he clenched the rumpled sheets in his fists. Schuldig must have sensed Ken's sudden urge to beat the living tar out of something because he soon found himself pressed down into the bed, a wrist pinned at each side of his head and his lips engaged in a deep kiss that scarcely allowed him to breathe.

He bucked against him, struggling but the grip that held him in place was firm and unflinching.

_'Ken. Kaetzchen...[3] calm down...relax. I know you're hurt but...let me explain. Yes, I love Ingrid, my wife.'_

Ken's jaw tightened but his body went lax, somehow pacified simply by the feel of the German so close to him. _'But?'_

Schuldig broke the kiss, pulling teasingly on Ken's bottom lip as he sat up. "I love her as a friend. I've known her since I was a boy in Germany. We grew up together. I married her...not out of a passionate love or regard but as a means of taking care of her. But it is still love. We had a daughter together, for that I am glad. She gave me a taste of normalcy." A quick grin. "It wasn't something I cared for much. She knows this."

Eyebrows lifted. "She knows?"

Loud laughter. Schuldig kissed Ken's nose in amusement. "Yes. It's not exactly something I can hide."

Ken nodded, the pieces slowly coming together, yet he was sure there was more to it than what the German let on, things were never so simple. But he knew better than to pry. If Schuldig wanted to divulge information about his past, he would listen but he wouldn't be the one to initiate such a confession. The past was behind them for a reason. Sometimes, it was better not to ask questions. As a fellow assassin, it certainly wasn't his place to pass judgement on Schuldig's actions, even if they did escape his comprehension. 

"Danke, liebe." [4]

* * * * *

Fingers ran through strands of ebony silk, short and well groomed. Those same fingers slid down over broad shoulders, sneaking beneath the collar of a well-starched shirt. 

No reaction.

Crawford continued to flip through the paper, a mug of hazelnut coffee in one hand warming his cold palms. 

Yoji huffed. "You suck Crawford."

A noisy crinkle as the newspaper was folded to facilitate reading. "No. That's your job."

"Che." Yoji flipped an errant lock of golden hair from his cheek. "You know sometimes Brad...I really have to wonder how high that stick is shoved."

Cold blue eyes turned to meet placid green. "Kudou. Take that cigarette out of your mouth."

Yoji lifted a lazy brow as if to say 'why should I?' or perhaps 'make me.'

Without missing a beat Crawford reached up, and yanked hard on the silken fabric of Yoji's wide collared shirt, their lips inches apart. Smoke curled lazily from the red cherry of Yoji's cigarette. "Yoji. Drop the cigarette." He reiterated coolly. 

The lanky blond slowly pulled the rolled tobacco stick from his thin lips. Quickened breaths intermingled as the phosphorescent kitchen lamp hummed over their heads. Neither willing to give an inch yet both wanting to bridge the inch gap between their lips.

"You're dropping ash on the floor."

Crawford turned slowly at the collected voice greeting them from the door. Clad in his favourite orange sweater, arms crossed over his chest, one eyebrow arching, loomed Ran Fujimiya. Violet eyes narrowed at the grey blotch of ash staining the normally immaculate white tiles. "You're going to clean that." It wasn't a request. Just a statement of reality.

"Hai hai." Yoji grumbled as he sauntered to the cupboard for the broom and dustbin.

Crawford resumed reading the paper.

Yoji watched Ran out of the corner of his eye as the tall redhead rolled up his sleeves, revealing alabaster skin. White hands closed over the coffeepot, tilting it to pour the remaining dark liquid into a black mug. He swirled the coffee in his mug for a moment, then bought it to his lips. Black enamel contrasting with white skin and red lips. A frown. The brownish gold liquid was tossed quickly into the sink with a flick of a slender wrist.

"Not good?" Yoji asked in amusement. 

"No." was Ran's quiet reply as he turned his back, busying himself with making a fresh pot of coffee, this time, choosing a different blend. French vanilla cream? Amethyst eyes scanned the label of the golden package. It was probably loaded with sugar. Weren't there any normal flavours? He sighed, settling on making his usual cup of mint tea in lieu of the sweetened coffee.

"How is Aya-chan?" Yoji asked at last, replacing the broom and moving to sit at the table, cigarette still dangling from his lips.

Ran's mouth quirked up at the corners ever so slightly at the mention of his beloved sister's name. "Good."

Yoji smiled, he liked Ran's sister. She was so happy and full of life and it was nice to see that at least _someone_ could manage to get Ran to actually smile and laugh. Ran's smile seemed to grow, eyes twinkling briefly.

"Actually Yoji, Aya's been-"

Yoji followed the path of those purple eyes, wondering what could have stopped the man so abruptly. Then he heard it. Loud thumping as two people thundered down the stairs laughing. Cries of 'Let go!' and 'That tickles' greeting the three men in the kitchen. Yoji's eyebrows rose in mild surprise as the two men stumbled in. Ken laughing, bent at the waist with Schuldig close behind, a hand on the other man's behind.

Ran's body stiffened, his fleeting smile vanishing, jaw clenched grimly.

Yoji's eyes darted from Ran's death glare to the possessive grip Schuldig had on Ken and swore softly. This was not going to be pretty.

* * * * * 

To be continued...

[1] _Utsukushii_: Beautiful, stronger than _kirei_ which is just pretty. 

[2] _Bitte_: Please. Just couldn't resist having Schuldig say that. ~.^

[3] _Kaetzchen_: Kitten.

[4] _Danke, liebe_: Thanks love. 

A.N.: ^^;;; Hontou gomen ne! For all of you who reviewed, thank you so much! I know I take a long time between postings but real life can seriously interfere with your hobbies sometimes, been dealing with death in the family, starting my Masters, working and a horde of other things these past few months. But I assure each and every one of you that yes I will finish it. Next chapter's the grand finale! ^.^ Umm...I think ^^;

Now for individual thanks, cuz each and every review is special in it's own way. ^_____^

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Kiri-hee hee don't feel bad for Schu-chan he got Kenken in this chapter! Woo! 

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Shuzuku-Another chapter posted so you can let go of my leg. *giggles* But I'm glad you like the story so much. ^____^ Arigatou!

**Little Nell-**Wah! Gomen for being an evil wench. ;_; I'll try to be faster for the next chapter. 

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Fei- What can I say? ^____^ Your fics inspired me, you encourage me and you're a wonderful friend. Thank you with all my heart. *hugs*

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Yuki-WeissKatzchen-You know...I had been contemplating a threesome...*cackles* D

**Zephel_sama**-I'm happy you love the story. ^__^ Danke.

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Bishie no Miko-Sorry for the paragraphing last time...I think I fixed it. ^^; And thanks for continuing to read R&W! You're a steadfast supporter and for that you get Kenken and Schu tied with a big red bow. ~.^

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delfin-Thank you for loving the fic! Weeeeee! *sniffles* So happy...

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Porcelain Dragon-Hai, Omi and Nagi are so cute! ^_^ Sorry for taking so long! Wah! Don't die! Onegai!

**Yaoke-** You need Ran and Ken together...? Mou...foo...don't hate me! *runs and hides*

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JK-Don't worry, there shall be a happy ending for all. ^____^

**Aishlin**-Yes! Kenken and Schuschu all the way! Woo! *glomps* Thanks for the support!

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Mayfly-Sugoi? Aww...*blush* Arigatou. ^^

**Ellyr-**Arigatou! You're so sweet to say such nice things! 

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Anonymous-Well...I don't know who you are demo...I'm glad you thought it was cute. I know I didn't explain Ran very much but that's because the fic is mainly supposed to deal with Ken. And seeing how long it already is...I did mention at the beginning though that the reason he started to open up again is because his sister is awake, she has been for two years. That's a long time for our little ice princess to defrost ne? But you'll understand more about his kindness to Ken in the next chapter. ^_^

**Jerry-**Thanks for taking the time to write me an email! ^_^ As promised here's the next chapter. 

**Eeyore**-*giggles* I'm still drooling over that fanart! *.* Tee hee! Thanks for thinking I'm awesome. *giggles and blushes*

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Eriol_sama-No more hurt for Kenken that's a promise. ^___^ And thanks for the email and the offer to help. 

Minna, arigatou gozaimasu!! *hugs everyone*


	10. Wild Card

Chapter 10: Wild Card

By Lola

Disclaimer: I don't own Weiss, people who are much more clever do. 

_________________________________________________________________________

Silence, tense and awkward filled the room. The only sound the occasional shuffling of paper as Crawford turned the printed pages of the newspaper on the table. Smoke trailed lazily from Yoji's cigarette, perched between his tightened lips, creating a haze in the kitchen that did nothing to lessen the cold violet glare aimed at the opposite end of the room. Yoji desperately wished he could think of something clever to say, a careless joke that would ease the tension in the room but all he could do was offer a nervous smile in Ran's direction. Aside from Crawford, the only other man in the room who seemed bored with the glare of death was the German. One hand still perched on Ken's hip like it had every right to be there and eyes staring right back at the pale redheaded leader of Weiss, unflinching, uncaring and completely confident. Ken shifted from foot to foot occasionally making a noise in his throat like he was about to speak only to lapse into an open-mouthed silence. 

Cold blue eyes finally decided to grace the rest of the men with a practiced glare, as if the silence was somehow an affront to the man reading the paper. Fixing his stare on the lanky man at his side, he snapped his paper closed and tucked it under his arm. 

"Kudou, take Schuldig for a drive." He paused, eyeing Ran and Ken before adding decisively, "A long drive." 

Yoji was just glad to have any excuse to get out of the range of Ran's wrath. Schuldig didn't move, only switched his stare from the cold redhead to the arrogant American. 

_'I'm not leaving Bradley.'_

Crawford adjusted his glasses, sliding them up the bridge of his nose with a finger in a gesture they'd all seen too often to take note of. "Go with Yoji." He raised a hand to silence any protest that would ensue, either verbal or mental. "If you stay, I'll get a headache."

Schuldig's grip on Ken tightened involuntarily before he finally looked away and muttered, "Selfish bastard."

Unfazed by this, Crawford tossed a silver card Yoji's way, which the blonde easily caught between long fingers. "Buy yourself something nice." Was the only explanation Crawford offered before disappearing up the stairs.

Green eyes blinked. Yoji stared at the platinum credit card in his hand, puzzled beyond words. However, not about to miss the chance to purchase an outfit that he'd wanted for quite some time to hit the clubs with he grabbed Schuldig's arm and dragged him out of the house, a grin fast spreading across his face when he imagined his lover's expression after his happy little shopping spree. 

Schuldig muttered a stream of curses as he was dragged away, casting a longing glance over his shoulder at Ken. Brown eyes gazed back, wide and confused and seeming totally lost. 

_'Don't worry kitten, I'll come back if you need me…remember, I can always hear you.'_

Ken nodded, lips parting into a genuine smile, and the German nearly lost it, wanting nothing more than to rush back and take the brunette in his arms. How long had he waited to see that smile again? It had seemed like an eternity before he had seen that light smile that reached his eyes and flooded the German with such a feeling of warmth. If Yoji weren't tugging at his arm he may have even considered skipping out of the room, so great was the effect of Ken's smile on him. But seeing as Ran was glaring icy daggers at his back, skipping somehow seemed out of the question. So he settled for flashing a wide grin back at his lover and a flirtatious wink. 

_'Love ya babe.'_

Ken's eyes nearly popped out of his head as they widened in surprise. Was Schuldig just teasing? What…? All of a sudden, just like that. Granted it wasn't the most romantic of confessions but with the smile and the look in those green eyes, Ken found himself unable to doubt the sincerity. And then he found himself staring at the wall where Yoji and Schuldig had just been moments before. Ken suddenly became acutely aware of the eyes boring into his face, trying to force his gaze away from where Schuldig had been. 

Slowly, he tore his gaze away from the door and looked up into cold violet. He took a step back at the flash of hurt that flitted briefly across Ran's face before the smooth mask of coolness was once again firmly in place. Ken bit his lip and started to speak but Ran help up his hand to silence him. 

As if in slow motion, Ran pulled a chair out and perched on the edge and seemed to sag against it, suddenly looking very tired as though the fight had fled him. "He loves you. Doesn't he?"

Ken sighed as he joined Ran, sitting across from the pale redhead. "I…I'd like to think so."

"Aa."

A long pause. 

"Ran…I never meant to-" Ken began softly, reaching out for his leader's white hand that seemed to blend with the cold ivory surface of the table. 

Violet eyes looked away as he bowed his head, face hidden beneath a veil of crimson. Ken's hand hovered uncertainly over his, unsure of whether the touch would be welcomed or not. Finally Ken simply let his hand rest beside Ran's. Ken's tanned fingers just barely brushing the redhead's ghostly white skin. Close enough to be taken if needed but not invading.

Ran's next words caught Ken completely off guard, seeming to sprout out of nowhere. 

"I'm moving to Prague. I leave in a week."

Ken blinked several times, wondering if perhaps the man in front of him was bluffing, pulling a wild card just to gauge his reaction. No. Ran would not do that. He may have hurt him in the past but he hardly thought lying something Ran would do. He studied the man across from him with a slight frown. He was leaning back in the chair, white fingers running through dark red strands in a rare display of unease. The motion allowing Ken a brief glimpse of an alabaster brow that was usually obscured by a thick crimson curtain of jagged bangs. Finally, purple eyes left the ceiling to stare back at Ken, one hand still holding the bangs out of his face. For a moment the pale face looking childlike and innocent. Untainted by the burdens of an assassin's life or the loss of family. This was Ran unmasked. Gentle, loving.

Beautiful.

And he might not ever be able to see it again. Ken's throat tightened involuntarily when Ran spoke again.

"Come with me?"

That deep voice, so soft, sounding every bit like a loving entreaty. Not the forceful, needy demand of a lover but rather said with the same uncertain questioning of a little boy asking for candy before dinner. Pale fingers closed around Ken's. 

"Please…?"

A soft kiss brushed over bronzed battle-scarred knuckles. Ken's mouth hung open, unable to voice anything over the rising lump in his throat as he tried to will the heat from spreading across his cheeks at the soft amethyst gaze holding him captive. Ken chewed on his bottom lip, at a loss. How could anyone think with those soft eyes gazing at you with such tenderness? Tenderness only for you! This had been Ken's dream for so long. How many times had he been sitting here with Ran, just like this, hoping for the usually unreachable redhead to display any hint of feeling? There was a time when Ken would have killed for a moment like this, was desperate for it and now…

Here they were.

Together.

Ken watched as Ran moved their joined hands to his face, pressing Ken's warm palm against the satiny soft skin of his cheek. Ken couldn't speak, feeling as though to say a word would shatter this moment forever and plunge them both back into cold reality. 

Ken was aware of the sound of wood scraping against tile as Ran shoved his chair back and stood and then he was surrounded in an embrace. Tight yet not overbearing. Ran had never held him like this. They stood there, Ken's arms slowly wrapping around the thinner man's torso, fingers curling into the fabric of his sweater. The scent of mint from Ran's tea still lingered about him and something softer and warm. Ran rested his forehead against the curve of Ken's shoulder, red hair spilling over the white t-shirt stretched across Ken's muscles. 

Like two statues they stood holding each other, marble and bronze.

Ran's warm breath stirred the short brown strands by Ken's ear. Brown eyes widened only to soften as a warm wet trickle slid down the curve of his neck. The voice in his ear tight with emotion.

"Ken…I can't lose you."

Ken closed his eyes, burying his nose in the older man's sweater, for this moment enjoying the tightening of the other's grip as he breathed against his neck. Tanned fingers fisted into the orange wool.

"Ran…".

_Gomen…_

* * * * *

Why was life so damned complicated? Why do people have to love and form relationships?

Ken Hidaka stared up at the sky painted in the rosy hues of sunset and sighed. "Because we need to…"

He sat on an old bench at the edge of the soccer field where he usually practiced. Patches of green dotted the snow, exposed from the spring rain earlier that day. The sprawl of white and green patches looking like a makeshift quilt spread out over the field. It was so quiet. Most children would be inside dining with their families. A soft smile ghosted across Ken's lips as he tilted his head back and closed his eyes. It was nice out here. Still a tad cold, winter not quite ready to release its icy clutch on the air but Ken found it calming.

His eyes watched the wispy clouds flit by the sun slowly and sighed.

What should he do?

His conversation with Ran played over and over in his head. Endless was the image of those pleading violet eyes. A gloved hand reached up to lay over his creased brow. What was he supposed to do…? It had all been like a dream, Ran's words, and his actions…

His eyes squeezed shut, shutting out the crimson light from the setting sun, the light certainly did nothing to help him. No path was laid clear before him; no enlightenment seemed to be forthcoming. Ran was going to Prague. Prague! In a week and he had asked Ken to go with him. Talk about random. 

Ken felt completely blindsided, not that he wasn't flattered by the invitation, he was sincerely touched but there are always complications with these things. Nothing is ever quite so clear-cut. Running off with Ran, as if no pain had ever lingered between them would be living a fairytale. Ken had long since quit believing in such fantasies. How could he when he had such a messed up reality? He straightened; back stiffening as he crossed his arms over his chest. He needed to think about this. He needed to formulate some kind of answer. Ran wouldn't wait forever and…neither would Schuldig.

Schuldig.

Ken's lips parted in another sigh. Should he even relay the conversation he'd had with Ran to his lover? Well it would probably be better than having the telepath accidentally garner the information himself. That would just hurt. 

A groan escaped him and he let his head fall into his hands. He needed help. He needed answers. He needed to know what the hell to do. How do you choose between a man whom you used to love with all your heart and a man who gives you his heart and his friendship freely? How do you compare the love from the past and the present?

"Perhaps comparisons are not meant to be drawn."

Ken jumped, whipping his head around only realizing at the sound of the other man's voice that he had spoken his last thoughts aloud. A cool face greeted him, the usual glasses absent from Crawford's face. 

"Coffee?"

Ken blinked, still unsure of how the man had seemingly just materialized before him out of thin air. He had never even heard his approach. Then he let his gaze drift to the two steaming Styrofoam cups held in leather-gloved hands. 

A black eyebrow arched when Ken simply sat there, staring slack-jawed at the coffee cups. "Or would you rather sit there gaping like a fish all night?"

Ken shook his head and quickly snatched the cup, the hot brown liquid sloshing about the rim and nearly spilling onto his hands as he muttered an apology before gulping some down hastily only to gasp and spit out the burning liquid onto the snow, creating a soft hiss and a burst of steam.

"Shit that's hot!"

Crawford dusted off the bench beside the brunette then adjusting his coat, sat lightly beside him, coffee held close to his thin lips.

"Coffee generally is."

A slow deliberate sip followed the words.

"…Right. Um…thanks."

Crawford nodded, still keeping his gaze focused forward as if the brunette was not seated at his side. Ken shifted awkwardly and decided to busy himself blowing repeatedly on his coffee. A deep breath drew the scent of vanilla coffee to his nose. Vanilla…soft…velvety smooth…the scent of Schuldig. Brown eyes darted back to Crawford. Had his choice of flavor been intentional?

"I knew you would be out here."

Ken let out a soft snort. "Is that a joke or something?" 

The oracle turned slowly to gaze levelly at his companion, the barest hint of a smile tugging at his lips and lighting his eyes. "Perhaps."

Ken's retort died on his lips. Crawford was smiling. _Smiling_. Not that it had never happened but usually the laughter was specifically reserved for Yoji or on occasion a reserved smile exchanged with Ran after some intellectual discussion. Ken was never privy to that hint of humanity in the former leader of Schwartz. He decided that he liked it. The proof that humor was not beyond the usually stiff man. At times Crawford reminded Ken a great deal of Ran. Both fearless leaders, both calm and composed, cold even but capable of taking charge of any situation. They both had a commanding air about them that could not be denied. But after hearing about Crawford from Schuldig, Ken had nearly thought the man devoid of any human feeling, or compassion. Obviously that could not be so if Yoji was so attached to the man but…having never witnessed any form of softness about the man Ken was at a loss to form an opinion regarding his goodness. 

Ken's features scrunched in contemplation. In fact, Crawford was rather handsome when not being his usual cold-hearted bastardly self. Yes, now he could see what Schuldig and Yoji had both fallen for. Blue eyes met brown and held the scrutinizing gaze without comment, letting the younger man size him up.

Finally after long moments of simply staring, Ken relaxed against the bench and brought the coffee cup to his chilled lips. "So. You found me. What's up? Or did you just come all the way out here to give me some coffee out of the kindness of your heart?" The humor was evident in Ken's voice as he took a long gulp of coffee.

"Why would I do something like that Ken?"

Ken rubbed the back of his head, messing up the short brown locks. "Um…because?"

Crawford set his cup of coffee down between them, steam still curling from the remaining heat that clung to the white foam. It reminded Ken of the smoke from Yoji's cigarettes though tinted more white than the usual blue gray from Yoji's mouth. 

"Maybe I just knew you needed to talk to someone."

Ken laughed outright at Crawford's statement. "Let me guess, you predicted it right? Got some vision of me going insane and so came out here to chat?"

"No. But I was at home when you and Ran had your little talk and I needn't remind you that voices carry in a quiet apartment."

A flush spread across Ken's cheeks. "Oh." 

Well, he felt like an idiot. Not that that was anything new per say but that hardly lessened his embarrassment. 

If Crawford noticed Ken's discomfort he spared him the embarrassment of remarking on it. Instead he crossed his legs and stretched an arm out across the back of the bench, fingers barely brushing Ken's shoulder. It wasn't meant as an inviting gesture, just a casual one. 

"So. What do you think about Ran going to Prague?"

Ken let out a long breath, fingers digging into his hair, knotting the fine strands the shade of rich chocolate. "I don't know…I'm…well happy in a way but also just confused as hell." A humorless laugh from parted lips. "Hey, you're the oracle Crawford, tell me what I'm supposed to do."

Crawford lifted his eyes to the sky where the pinkish glow of sunset was fast fading. "You know I can't."

Ken's body sagged against the bench, legs stretching out before him. "What would you do?"

Crawford turned to look at him, dark blue eyes piercing. "I would stop worrying about the past and the present and seriously consider the future."

Ken sat up. "That's easy for you to say! You know your future! All you have to do is do whatever will have a good result and you're set!"

"I can't predict everything Ken."

Ken's voice was soft, a defeated slump to his shoulders. "I know…"

Finally after a long lapse of silence Crawford rose. "I can't tell you who to choose…" he began, collecting his cup of coffee and turning to study the seated man. "But you should consider who would put you first. Otherwise, you may be trapped with someone whose thoughts would forever be reserved for someone else." A frown creased his brow as if he had said too much and then he retreated back across the soccer field. 

Ken watched Crawford's form disappear. He wasn't certain he felt any better but he did know he needed to talk to Ran again. 

* * * * *

Ken made his way home, sluggishly walking through the Koneko to make his way to the apartment complex beyond. He blinked and quickened his pace at the sound of raised voices. One high and the other slightly nasal in tone. Ken's stomach did an involuntarily flip flop at the sound of the second voice. Sitting by the computer, Schuldig and Omi. Schuldig was at the keyboard, clicking madly with the mouse, playing some computer game that had some cute jungle music playing. Ken approached slowly and leaned against the wall, intent on watching this interesting scene unobserved for as long as possible. 

"There! Click on the monkey!" Omi implored, hovering about the German's shoulders and pointing at the screen. 

"Whose the goddamn zookeeper here _bishounen_? Me or you? You had your turn now it's mi-No!" Schuldig let out a frustrated wail as all the cute round little animals on the screen dispersed signifying his loss. 

Omi crossed his arms and nudged Schuldig out of the seat with his hip. "I told you to click on the monkey."

The German was about to ready a retort when a bout of laughter drew his attention to the door. Ken was nearly bent in half in hysterics at the sight of his lover playing computer games with Omi. Schuldig placed an indignant hand on his hip and gave a toss of his flame colored hair.

"And what, are _you_ laughing at Kenken?" he drawled out as he approached the brunette, trapping him against the wall by pressing his palms against the wall on either side of Ken's face.

Ken stopped chuckling long enough to look up into Schuldig's face and answer with a wide grin. "You."

It was all over from there. He was soon pressed against the wall in a searing kiss and his own hands found their way eagerly beneath the German's shirt, palms sliding up toned muscles. Schuldig hooked his thumbs around Ken's belt and pulled him forward, grinding their hips together and forcing Ken's back to arch off the wall as a groan escaped him. Things would have no doubt gotten a lot more scandalous if Omi had not cleared his throat loudly and made his presence known. Eyes dark, Ken glanced over the German's shoulder and offered an apologetic smile to the blonde who was fuming at their display. 

Schuldig backed off, letting just his palm rest on Ken's hip while his other hand readjusted his shirt. "Wanna go out tonight _kaetzchen_?"

Ken blinked. He was supposed to be talking to Ran… "Out?"

A slow grin spread across thin lips. "Yes. Out. With Kudou and everyone." 

'_I want to show you off…'_ his mind purred.

Ken smiled, unable to resist the fluttery feeling that came over him when Schuldig looked at him with those green eyes. "Is Ran coming to?"

Something flashed briefly across Schuldig's features. Was it hurt? Soon it was gone as he released the brunette and turned. "Ask him yourself." He turned and left pausing only to call over his shoulder, "I'll be here to pick you up in an hour. Make yourself pretty."

Ken swallowed. He had the sinking feeling that he has said something very wrong. He sighed and glanced at Omi who was looking at him in what could be either sympathy or disbelief that he could be so stupid when dealing with the two redheads in his life. Ken closed his eyes to block out the big blue eyes staring at him and sighed. 

"Ne Omi?"

"Hai Ken-kun?"

Brown eyes searched the ceiling, knowing a certain scarlet haired man to be there probably reading or polishing his katana then dropped his gaze to the floor.

"Nothing." He shook his head in an attempt to clear the dueling thoughts in his brain and went upstairs. 

He stood outside Ran's door, one palm resting on the smooth wooden surface and let his fingers slide down to the handle. The metal cool against his fingertips as they curled around it. He turned the knob and entered. As he'd expected, Ran lay on his bed, a book in his lap, violet eyes darted upwards to meet his inquisitively at the intrusion. 

Ken let the door close behind him with a soft click and leaned against it, feeling that if he did not have support his legs may very well turn to jelly. Steadying himself Ken breathed out the words that most people dread hearing and are uncomfortable saying. 

"We need to talk."

To be continued…

A.N.: Ok, that was an evil place to end it I'm aware. ^^;; I know I've taken forever to post but that's what happens with two jobs and doing your Masters full time. You get a wee bit drained. Or in my case, you get mono. -_- But now the semester is over!!! Woooo! So I should have more time to write. I thought I could finish it in this chapter but no….damn story taking a life of it's own! *waggles fist* Ahem. But I think one more chapter and an epilogue should do it. ^_^  
  
So, a huge thank you to all who reviewed the last chapter and to all those who managed to read this one. ^_^ Feel free to pelt me, I deserve it. 

To all who reviewed, chapter 9, thank you for letting me know how you felt about it. ^___^ *glomps everyone *

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Dragonfire~ Sorry, this took a long time. ^^;;; Because I suck. Actually had this written for awhile but wasn't pleased with it but finally decided to post.

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Sammy-chan ~ Wai wai! I'm so glad you read it! *hugs * It's been too long! Ne, feel free to email me anytime. ^_^

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Lady Kickass ~ Yeah, you're right I did take way too long. I'm glad you like the pairing. Schu/Ken is one of my faves too. Well…I guess that's kinda obvious. ^^;

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Mina XP ~ *weezes from being strangled * A-anou…glad you liked it. *cough * Next time, don't squeeze so hard. 

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Eeyore ~ *hugs * I'm happy you liked it!! Your drawings are certainly good motivation for me. ^________^ Have I told you how much I love your art? Well I love your art. ~.^ 

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Redemption Moon ~ *blinks * Are? You missed a chapter? The eighth one? If you still haven't been able to read it, let me know and I'll send it to you pronto. ^___^

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Kia ~ *laughs * No…Ran didn't go on a killing spree, though I was sorely tempted but really who would he kill? They're all too pretty to die. ~.^

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Aishlin ~ ^_______^ Don't worry, all will be happy in the end. That's a promise.

Nadare ~ It's true you don't see this triangle very often, tis a shame too. It's so fun! ^___^ 

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Shuzuku ~ Elephants? ._. Kowai!! *hides * Don't worry, I will finish it. ^__^ Especially if I want my leg back. *laughs * 

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Siberian ~ *giggles * A threesome? Well…I must say I've been thinking of it. ^_^ I'm glad you like the writing style. I find it's a good style for this kind of fic. 

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Pandora.81 ~ Hee hee! Yeah, I'm normally a huge Schu/Aya fan demo…I don't know what possessed me here. 

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Fuzzish ~ I love people fighting over Ken too. He just seems like a good guy to fight over. 

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Mairiana ~ Yeah, I couldn't resist the uke Schu, just something I thought was too delicious to resist. And you're right, there certainly aren't enough Schu/Ken fics out there. That's why I must devote myself to encouraging the pairing!

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Fei ~ *uber glomps * Of course you know how happy I am that you read this and like it! You're opinion means so much to me. ^_______^

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Chibi koneko ~ *grins * I love making Schu/Ken lovable to people. Thank you for thinking so. ^__^

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Yaoke ~ Er…gomen ne…^^;;;


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